Lahling ah

ok. just now i went out with my dear lahling. we went to the NLB to find some of my PW materials. spending a whole day with him taught me something about him. he wore the same perfume, he dresses the same fashion, he eats the same way and he made me happy to the exact same extent. just like METKF. hish. i cant believe it. no wonder i kept kissing his shoulders. it was that damn perfume. that exact same perfume i've lived with for the past 3 yrs of my life. everything i buried just popped back up. my lahling realli reminded me of METKF. ok enough of METKF. whatever it is my lahling realli made me happy. thnx eh babe. thnx for the time n listening ear. i realli appreciate it. =) ok i'm done. haha. *what a pathetic post.*

ps. lahling ah.

wa pilan2 sidang jiatuh cinta sama lu lei.

jangian ini maciam lah.

wa manyak silam sikali.

``Mat Jenin

its ok

"I saw you with your new girl just yesterday,

And I feel that i must confess.

Even though it kills me to have to say,

I'll admit that I was impressed."

well. happy 12 days to u two. i think i have nothing more to say. it seem so easy for u to move on. so easy for u to find a replacement. maybe because u already knew her for like quite sometime already. u dont know how much it hurts to see that. to see how much u eased out of ur previous relationship with me. it just hurts so much. but u were so happy. for that i think i'm happy for u too. i hope i'm strong enough to face all these. u've put me in much much worse situations before and i made it thru. why not now? its hard to move on in the first place. i am just so thankful that i have my frens around me. i know for now that i dont need a relationship. after seeing u n ur new gf, it made me double sure that i dont want a relationship. because firstly, i have my studies. secondly, i dont want additional problems. thirdly, i need time to move on. i dont wanna reminisce animore. i just wish both of u all the best for ur future. *smiles* i hope she'll love u better than i do. *now i am angry.*

cheebai lah. stupid cheating bastard. u ass-headed motherfucker.

u think ur the sweetest guy-with-a-dick in the entire whole wide world? u r sooooooo wrong, Mister.

we'll see who gets the last laugh, idiot.

whatever it is, happy going-thru-the-ups-&-DOWNS-together to the both of u.

ps. bitch, i dont hate u. i hate ur bf.

*ok. after all that, i feel better now. =)*

``Mat Jenin

Zimbabwe

well last few days were just super awesome. i had my dose of fun on monday which is RACIAL HARMONY DAY! yay! haha. n i got myself a self-proclaimed temporary boyfriend. haha. Mr Jul-Keith-Lee. =)) well. on monday it turns out as expected. like more than 3/4 the sch's population r NOT in their costumes. like wth. so tk sporting. sheesh. aniwae. i got my bangs. literally everyone called me a Zimbabwean-Born Chinese. super kurang ajar. haha. i am not lah kn. although i do agree that i look very much like a zimbabwean in cheongsam. =P. haha. so yeah. for once in my life, i LOVED monday. gosh. the day went by so fast lah kn. oh yah. my TBF sent me home. *haiya Jul. tengkiu vely mas ah 4 sentin me home ah. vely suwit ah u.* ok the typical me. pictures. =)

me n zahrah.me n handryfandy n meme n nizar *this handry dont know how to take a simple picture. grr.*amirah n me darlinhidayah n memeet the temporary boyfriend. =P


ps. i stopped talking to u i guess. why? i dont know.

``Mat Jenin

Pantun

yday we went to the pantun finals. n after rounds of stupidity, we came in 3rd. hee. expected mah. haiya. then after that we changed n we went off to kak su's mum's boutique n stayed there n chatted for a few hours with cg lilla. then cg lilla went for a full body massage n we went off. we as in hidayah hafiz zul n me. we went off to bugis junction n stayed there for a while. then suddenly, while we were beside a man's clothes retailer, the song 'Get Low' was played. n guess what hafiz did. yeah. he danced. yes. he danced in the middle of that bugis junction. it was damn embarrassing lah! everybody was looking sia. he didnt particularly dance tau. he swayed n grinded on the wall sia! irritating sey. so memalukan. haha. i got the video lah aktuali but i hadnt got time to upload it yet. if i do then i'll post it up. *embarrassing him is my hobby. =)*

well. yday was also the day i got to know something i wished i didnt know. i didnt know that u could do this to me. i thought i could rely on u. but u made me feel i was wrong. u made me feel that u;ve played me behind my back. u changed. u keep making me feel that way. kept going against ur own words. i know i shouldnt say all these but i just cant stop myself. u have ur own life now. i cant possible contain everything under my control n acknowledgement. i hope ur happy with what ur doing. i hope u'll finally understand what i'm going thru as much as i know what ur going thru. i hope u know that u've changed. i dont think i fit in ur category animore. i'm sorry. its just me i guess. now all i want from u is one thing n one thing only. please. ignore me.

ps. i'll still love u no matter what.

``Mat Jenin

post exam

i feel so lethargic lah at school just now. i'm still in the post exam holiday mood sey. haiya. so difficult to suddenly adapt to the assembly just now morning. haha. aniwae my first official lesson starts at 10 which is PE. since it was raining we had to go to the centre stage for a re-grouping of the games group. supposedly i was supposed to be in the hockey games group. but eventually i just realised i hadnt taken my NAPFA test cuz i was on long term mc ever since the starting of the year. so i decided to join in with the NAPFA failures just so i can take my test. n guess what. as usual, when hafiz found out i was with the NAPFA failures, he kept laughing his ass off every single time he saw me *and that's like what? every minute?* wth.

den it was time to take my weight. so paisey lah kn cuz everybody arnd me were particularly guys. then my PE teacher in charge, Mr Sir said, "Do you want me to read out your weight for u or u want to look down and read it urself?" out of laziness, of course i said, "nvrmind ah cher. u read out for me ah. i lazy uh." den u know what he did? i stood on the weighing scale and suddenly he shouted sia, " Izyan, 76.5kg!!!!" i was like OMG! wtf! so paisey lah! den he laughed. i really thought he was saying the truth sey. luckily he was joking. i felt so relieved lah kn. haha. ehem2. now i can proudly say that i dropped 2 kg over the exam period to 56 kg. teehee. =))

ok then after PE me dayah hafiz n handry realised the canteen stall had this new drinks menu. so colourful. hehe. they sold pink champange, blueberry, orangejuice, grape and other coloured drinks lah. then we bought 3 of em. suddenly our break felt so rainbow-ish.

haiya. these two ppl just dont wanna get out of my life n my pictures. oh yah btw, just now morning, during the grooming check in class, i 'pau-to' hafiz. i told my form teacher he had a tatoo. on his forehead. haha.

``Mat Jenin

thanks

i thought if i did nice things to people n act like myself, i would get something nice back in return. but it turns out to be the other way round. why? i dont know. but i just cant stop asking myself. all i wanted was to move on. is it even wrong? am i even allowed to? i am just so freaking lucky that i have my friends around me. they're the only people that makes my world go round. gerl, i so need u now. cuz i'm fucking pissed with myself.

ps. ~just when i thought u make me feel secure.
~just when i thought i can learn to move on.
~just when i thought things are getting better.
~just when i thought i've learnt to love u.

``Mat Jenin

new hottstuff

guess what. i've gotten over the fact. the truth. the reality. like finally.

n i got a new hottstuff.

he's dark.

the way i like it. =)

keep ya'll updated.

oh yah btw.

STOP telling me that me n hafiz look good together!

he looks good wo a gf.

teehee.

ok. gtg.

will update soon.

``Mat Jenin