its hard being me

Every day.

2010-08-26T22:23:00.001+08:00

Every single morning without fail,
I will msg or call you to check whether you've woken up.

Every single second without fail,
I will wonder what exactly are u doing,
And whether u are thinking of me.

Every single week without fail,
I will think of new ways to motivate you through your course of A Levels and make you happy;
Sending surprises, making gifts and giving you presents.

Every single hour without fail,
I will have to force and prevent myself from calling or msg-ing you,
I don't wanna disturb you too much.

And every single time when I am left alone,
Without fail,
I will convince myself that you do care about me the way I care about you, even if you actually don't.

Because I really love you.

Advertisment Seminit.

2010-07-11T01:46:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe.

30th July 2010 ;
Projek Monolog Artistik.
@ The Arts House (Play Den)
.$22.

31st July ;
Diari Hitam - Bukan maksudku.
@ National Library (Possibility Room L5)
.FREE.

I'll be very very very very very busy for the next 2 weeks because of these concurrent events. Please do support me and my fellow friends by turning up for either one of these. To my loves, i'm sorry for not spending enough time with u guys. i promise that i'll make it up to u people on day. (:
oh and if u need more information, please call or msg me. or better still, fb.
HIDUP TEATER MELAYU!

``Mat Jenin

Jiwang sikit.

2010-06-17T17:53:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

hari ni aku nak mengucapkan terima kasih kepada beberapa orang.

Hidayah Manan.
Hafiz Yusof.
Yus Handry.

Terima kasih kerana setia berada di samping aku tatkala susah, tatkala senang. Korang lah kawan sejati aku. Aku takkan pernah lupakan korang sampai bila2. Nanti kalau kita dah kahwin, kita jodohkan anak2 kita antara satu sama lain k. tapi aku tak nak kahwinkan anak aku pada anak hafiz. sebab nanti cucu aku keluar tak handsome.

Anyways.

Aku juga nak berterima kasih kepada lagi seorang insan teristimewa dalam hidup aku.

Zulkifli Hassan.

Walaupun awak banyak buat saya pening kepala, awak tahu yang saya tetap sayangkan awak. Terima kasih sebab sudi terima saya seadanya dan berada di sisi saya apabila saya betul2 memerlukan tempat mengadu dan melepaskan ehem... ehem tu maksud dia geram. jangan nak fikir yang bukan2 ye korang.

Sampai kita berjumpa lagi di alam barzakh.
ish yan. selisih. di lain kali maksud saya.
oak abe abe.

``Mat Jenin

Save me

2010-06-02T11:30:00.001+08:00

Save me please. Someone, anyone?

Saddened

2010-05-24T22:50:00.001+08:00

Oak Abe Abe.

I just feel like crying. I just feel like wailing. To my heart's content. I soo need a hug. )':

<3

2010-05-20T15:35:00.001+08:00

Rindu adalah minyak yang menyemarakkan lagi api cinta.
Jadi...
Cepat panggil bomba!
saya dah terbakar.
Hehe.

-Zulkifli.H

I love you, I swear. (:

Sibuk

2010-05-18T12:51:00.001+08:00

Banyak sangat orang yang sibuk. Baik sibuk bekerja sampai terlupa pasal aku, atau yang sibuk sekolah sampai takde masa untuk aku. Yang lain sibuk bersekolah sampai takde masa untuk aku dan ade pulak yang sibuk nak amek tahu hal luar dalam aku. Aku pulak sibuk dengan isu2 dalaman aku. Baik drama, baik keluarga, baik kekasih mahupun hidup aku. Segala2nya sibuk. Sampaikan aku sendiri takde masa untuk berhenti dan berfikir, tentang baik buruk akibat keputusan yang aku buat sekarang.

Baikkk broooo.

D5D

2010-04-28T13:06:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

DEPOT 5 DARA is in 2 more days!!

omg.

i hate the feeling of..
the heart in my mouth,
the butterflies in my tummy
and the questions in my mind,

but i love the feeling of..
the flowers in my heart.

((:

``Mat Jenin

feelings

2010-04-09T12:54:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe.

i feel bad. fucking bad. you know why? you dont? well. neither do i. i've not been spending enough time with lahling. he got school, i got drama. oh hells. i cant wait for depot and aesop to end. no no no. its not because i hate the productions. u know how much i looove drama productions.. its only because i feel that i'm not giving enough time for my family, for my bf. my mom has started nagging. my bf has started asking. and all these are making me feel like a jerk. ok lah, not literally. but still. this feeling sucks. i hate it. oh june, please come quickly. ):

ok dah. actually i'm supposed to be working right now and..... ohh. work. wahlauwei.

``Mat Jenin

Diam.

2010-04-01T15:48:00.007+08:00

Diam, aku kata diam!

Ada orang tak tau diam;

Mulutnya membebel, tak berhenti, tak tahu makna diam.

Ada orang pula tidak tahu duduk diam.

Merayap merayau ke sana sini, pantat tak tahu diam.

Ada pun orang yang pura-pura diam;

kerana takut, kerana patuh, kerana entah apa sebabnya, dia terus diam.

Ada juga yang secara semula jadi pendiam;

tanyalah apa jawapan sekalipun, mungkin dia senyum, namun dia tetap diam.

Ada pula yang terdiam membisu seribu bahasa;

terperanjat, terkejut, tidak tersangka, sehingga lidah kelu berkata-kata, maka dia pun diam.

Ada juga yang mendiamkan diri;

tidak mahu tidak rela mengundang fitnah salah faham, ikut pesan nabi lebih baik diam.

Ada bemaksudkan diam tanda setuju;

Tunduk tanda malu, maka apa-apa keputusan pun bererti ya, setuju, selagi kau diam.

Kalau kena diam membatu;

berbuallah kau dengannya, lebih baik layankan tembok, kerana sama-sama tidak beremosi, sama-sama diam.

Mungkin aku yg patut diam.

kerana selama ini aku bising sangat. seminit pun tak tau diam.

Mungkin aku yang patut diam, buang ezlink, jangan merayap ke mana-mana lagi, duduk rumah diam-diam.

Mungkin juga aku pura-pura diam;

kerana takutkan, segan atau tunduk patuh, maka aku harus diam.

Ataupun aku seharusnya menjadi pendiam;

walhal sebenarnya aku ni memang pendiam orangnya.

Aku mungkin terdiam;

kalau ada yang benar-benar bersungguh2, dengan entah apa kuasa, dapat melenyapkan sesuatu dalam sekelip mata.

Mungkin lebih baik mendiamkan diri;

maka tidak menimbulkan fitnah atau buruk sangka, senyum kambing sepenuh masa.

Atau berangguk-angguk diam;

layankan setiap gerak geri, biarlah biarkan apa sahaja; apa nak jadi, jadilah...

Namun tidak mudah untuk aku diam membatu;

kerana aku masih punyai perasaan. hatiku berdegup darah merah, bukan seketul batu simen dan bancuhan air tanah.

Diam membawa seribu makna tersirat. Bila kesabaran tergugat, terdiam tecegat.

jangan sampai ku perlu ulangi, sesal kemudian tiada berguna lagi.

...

``Mat Jenin

2010-03-28T23:29:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

i am super busy with shooting and drama, i barely have time for my beloved boyfriend.
sorry lahling, please tell me u will be free this coming weekend.
i wanna go out with youuuuu.
GAAHHHH.

``Mat Jenin

2010-03-23T08:51:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

up till today, my mind is still stuck with one thing. i shall not mention what is that 'thing' i'm talking about, but i just wanna say that its bothering me very very much. i need help, but i'm afraid. i need to talk, but i dont know how. wahlauwei.

ps. wo ai ni.
pss. i know ps has nothing to do with the post. hahaha.

``Mat Jenin

2010-03-19T12:34:00.001+08:00

oak abe abe.
this will be a very short post.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
aku jatuh cinta... sekali lagi. (:

``Mat Jenin

2010-03-16T17:45:00.001+08:00

oak abe abe.

this message goes out to one person and one person only.

TO YOU.
i lost ur number.
so try your best to get my new number.
i'll be waiting for ur msg. (:

``Mat Jenin

screams

2010-03-12T08:59:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe!

i have good news and bad news.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
the bad news is i cant buy my AINO phone because its too expensive. :(((
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
the good news is..... I GOT AN iPHONE FOR FREE!!!!! *screams*

oh wells. anyway.
its the time of the month where i can cry laugh and shout for no reason.
dont blame me. blame the pms.

ps.
i love you dear uncle.
i love you dear family. (:

``Mat Jenin

Kepada yang bernama kemarahan

2010-03-09T08:40:00.003+08:00

Terlalu jauh untuk mengusapi
seraut wajah bernama insan
walau di sini aku telah lama
berkunjung dan berhenti
pada suatu persinggahan.

Api yang semarak dan menyala
tidak mungkin dapat dipadam
setelah pintu kesabaran
terkunci mati dan diri
pun tersadai di lembah
nafsu yang menggila.

Tuhan
telah Kau taburi butir-butir keinsafan
mungkin setelah aku
meluangkan sedikit masa mengingati-Mu
dan menghumbankan sesuatu
sifat yang dibenci, yang dikeji.

``Mat Jenin

2010-02-28T21:28:00.002+08:00

aku sayang korang. sumpah.

aku rindu korang. sumpah square. (:

``Mat Jenin

2010-02-24T12:58:00.003+08:00

remember those times,
when we used to gossip about people.
we felt so invincible.

remember those times,
when we used to laugh and chat and bitch
about almost anything under the sun.
we felt as though nothing can tear us apart.

remember those times,
when i needed ur help,
and i dont know who to turn to,
but u were there, always there,
to lend me a listening ear, a crying shoulder.

remember those times,
when we keep debating about love,
and u didnt believe a single thing i say,
well look at where u are now,
so happy, so cheerful,
i am very proud of u.

i remember the time,
when i missed the most important date of ur life,
ur 20th birthday,
i never plan it to be that way
because we both know that i wouldnt miss it for the world.
but i did. i'm sorry.

i hope u remember those times we had,
because i will always do,
and i wont be able to forget it,
no matter how much i want to.

ps. dedicated to a special friend i'll always remember, NurAmirahRazak.

``Mat Jenin

2010-02-13T15:34:00.005+08:00

oak abe abe.

honestly, i dont think u have moved on. ask yourself the same question, u will also think the same. but sacrificing now for the past? i dont think so. but what makes u think u can go on like this? what makes u think that dwelling will ever solve anything? come on man. u are a freaking guy so just stand up and face me will ya?

i'm sick of these nosey people and i'm sick of ur empty words. i can do and will do everything in my power to get back whatever i lost. but u? will u do the same thing? i dont think so. all because of ur fucking big ego. oh and ur fucking fat gf. penakut sak. puh-lease eh people. tolong lah jangan jadi kedi dalam hidup. and to the gf2 kat luar tu, tolong lah jangan nak queen control jantan kau. kalau takde ape2 yang kurang pada diri kau, asal kau takut jantan kau lari kat betina lain? lain lah kalau kau tau yang jantan kau tu tak suka dengan ape yang kau ade sekarang. so tak masuk akal ok.

anyway. the bottomline is that u should shut up and stop telling urself about how pointless ur life is and how things can be better. come up to me and spit ur words to my face. only then u can talk about making things better. oh and dont even expect me to give up my everything when u cant even give up ur pathetic, unsincere relationship for the one u claim to be ur everything. tolong eh. jangan pathetic. aku benci orang talam dua muka macam kau. lagi2 yang cakap tak serupa buat. betul2 tak bermakna hidup kau. kesian.

ps. gambar takde kena mengena dengan post ni.

pss. i just wonder why the hell i am soo in love with this utterly random but sweet guy. (:

``Mat Jenin

2009-12-16T18:15:00.004+08:00

oak abe abe.

i have a feeling. a very strange feeling.
a feeling that i'm not looking forward to.
if, just if it was not meant to be, please dont let me go back to where i first started.

.
..
...
....
.....
......
.......
........
.........
..........
...........
............
.............
..............
...............
................
.................
..................

I WANNA PASS MY A LEVELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

heh. ape je tau yang korang fikir.
:P

``Mat Jenin

2009-12-14T22:56:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!

yesterday was awesome. zati [yes, ZATI.] and muna came over because they claimed that they were soo freaking bored. and we spent the whole afternoon and night chatting and gossiping. oh and disturbing muna. hahaha. it was uber fun i tell u. beeccaauussee simply i miss my zati. i really do. its been eons since i last saw her lor. anyway she slept over at my place because she was too lazy to go home. as usual lah kan. heh.

just now i had voluntary work at Jamiyah with dear lahling. to get the residents to sign on the wishing spheres. it was eye-opening i must say. with their life stories and all. after the trip we went back to esplanade before proceeding to school for MI's band performance with lahling and his friends. the performance was fine, at least better than the last, so, congrats! ok i think that is all for now lah. oh btw thanks zee for letting me use ur laptop to update my blog. *whispers* takut zai marah aku lagi ah. hahaha.

RANDOMthoughts.
kau jangan perasan jubor yang tu anak kau.
sebab sememangnya kau tak layak untuk memegang gelaran AYAH. ((:

``Mat Jenin

2009-12-12T23:36:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe!

sorry for privatising my blog hor. some people just dont know when to quit. heh. well, its LOVE lah. love makes u go crazy even after the relationship ended. heh. anyway. i went prawning with lahling just now! super awesome. like at last i get my dose of prawning lor. haha. oh and my tagboard dah takde sebab.. u read it. hee. i've nothing more to say to that. life must go on ok? mishary was discharged from the hospital yesterday. had some complications here and there but he's fine. thanks to urs truly lah kan. *beams* thanks to my friends who came to visit. love korang many2. ok lah i want to get some sleep. i'm going out with handry tmrw soo i need extra energy to layan his nonsense. haha. nights.

Ya Allah.
please make it happen. please let it last.
Amin.

``Mat Jenin

2009-12-03T09:20:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

listen beloved readers. from now on i wont be posting pictures here at my blog because firstly, blogger is being such a bitch, secondly i am lazy to upload and thirdly i dont want too many people coming to my blog. anyway, i think i am going to privatise my blog soon. kalau korang ade ape2 just find me through facebook ochey? *smiles*

dear ex bf.
i dont have anything to say to you since you dont want to do this the civilised way.
only one thing that i have left to say.
karma is descending its effects on you now. (:

to the public - including u, mr ex bf.
i have every right to publish any, i repeat, ANY photos that i want or i wish to and you dont have any right over my actions because simply, you dont OWN me, you dont pay for my living and i dont owe u anything. unless of course, i call u IBU or BABA then u have all the right over my actions in every possible way.

yes i do believe in karma. that's why i believe that u deserve everything that you are going through now. ok lah, almost everything. remember what u did to me sometime ago? all those lying and cheating and negligence. i went through it alone. and lierally ALONE. sooooo. now its ur turn. alah its simple lah baby. i call it beautiful karma. ((:

sheesh. i miss babydarling.
lahling cepat balik ok? i wanna go prawning. heee.

``Mat Jenin

back back back ey.

2009-11-26T17:11:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!

ade orang dah complain yang blog ni berhabuk. heh. sooooooooo i decided to update something. this is for u zai! ((: lately i've been super duper busy with my exam lah. so sorry for the delay. but guess what? i'm only left with one paper only! and then i will really be able to enjoy the word "freedom". heeee. my love life has been awesome. minor downs here and there but we managed to get the mood back up. *smiles* relationships are never complete without misunderstandings and little quarrels, ey?

oh btw zai, ur fren is my bf's ex-gf's poly mate. ok random but yeah. hehe.

oh talking about ex-es. my EX BF is being irritating. listen, 'love'. i really dont understand what the hell u are trying to prove but it is seriously not funny. if u do have anything to say or clarify, just PRIVATELY msg me. i have a hp for a reason u know. grr. bloody irritating sia. we made a deal so STICK TO IT.

ok dah. i guess that's it. anything further, ms zainuriah will remind me to update my blog again. hee. oh and zai, AKU RINDU KAU OK? ((((((:

``Mat Jenin

2009-10-04T21:35:00.007+08:00

oak abe abe people of the world!

i've not been updating cuz i've so many things on my mind that i have to do. anyway. raya outing was yesterday and it is super fun. very fun. i was glad that some of my friends are having fun the way they should and not dwell over pathetic problems. oh yes. u know what? i have a new fan reading my blog right now. some yellow-teethed slut. heh. tak mampu beli berus dan ubat gigi sebab duit semua dah spent beli barang2 "branded'. kesian. anyway. blogger is so annoying nowadays. pfft. so cant upload much pictures as yet. maybe soon ok? =)

and this paragraph is going to be a bit songsang because it is dedicated to songsang bitch.

what makes u think that i dont know anything about u? at least i dont abort babies, u cheap slut. and it wasnt a mistake. u did it once and u did it again. wah. macam free gitu eh Tuhan kasi kau baby? then kau suka2 je buang. at least my parents know everything i do and did. my stories are long over. urs arent because in this very second, ur story is circulating around me and you like wildfire. oh and btw. i wonder what is so pretty about u. umm. white, cheap, aneroxic.. did i mention cheap? itu belum masuk gigi kuning, takde pantat, takde tetek, asyik fail exam, gp pun susah nak pass, perasan virgin padahal dah beribu kali kena mantat... gigi kuning.. oh oh. dah cakap eh? haha. sorry ah. eh betina. u hit the wrong spot ah eh. ur comment isnt cutthroat. so biar aku advice kau sikit. just get this into that puny brain of yours. stop ur childish acts of blog-bitching about people and mind ur own business. ape? life kau tu boring sangat ke sampai nak kena masuk campur dalam hal hidup orang? if u dont have anything better to do then just go fuck and sleep [eh cannot sleep. because u cannot stay out late mah.] with ur mat motor OR ur bf like u always do. or better, go study GP. its worthwhile. =)

ok dah. ish i terikut2 perasan, u... heh. i wanna go sleep lah. very super sleepy and tired. oh oh. and babe, your flower still with me sia. when u want me to pass to you? cemburu i tengok bunga tu hari2. heee. lovelove~

``Mat Jenin

2009-09-15T12:08:00.002+08:00

disclaimer: this post is going to be very super freakishly emo-ish.

i am definitely asking for too much, perhaps, more than what i deserved. i dont expect it. it just came to me. yes i had it but i'm not prepared to lose it as yet. sometimes i wonder whether is it just me, or is it them, who will always come up with lame but surprisingly reasonable excuses? i cant help but feel inferior. i'm not smart, i'm fat, i'm short, i'm boy-ish, not ur typical kind of girl-next-door. why is it that i must always lose it? i know my flaws and i know it too well. and thats the reason why i am writing this. i'm sorry if i was too demanding. i'm sorry if i was being ambiguous. i guess i was too selfish.

u made me realise how much love can change our lives; sometimes for the better, others for the worst. and for that i thank u. i will keep my promise dont u worry. i have gotten more than i ever wanted now. and i will not ask for more. its all yours. =)

ps. this is not dedicated to anyone in particular. just my random thought fishings.

2009-09-06T20:14:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

i've not been updating lately cause i am so super busy with school. my exam dates are drawing soo near but i am so very not prepared. pfft. now thanks to hafiz and handry, this sudden urge to mug are overpowering my thoughts. hoots. *boleh meletup sey kepala* chey bedek ah. sorry ah people. i just feel like rambling nonsense on my blog right now. wa wa wa wa wa wa wa wa. oh a'ah. btw kan. i'm having a hard time forcing myself to study. as much as i want to mug, i just cant. because number 1, i'm lazy and number 2, i am lazy. not forgetting number 3, sheer laziness again. wah. kalau aku continue gini, mampos laki aku mati tak makan. hahaha. tak nak masak, tak nak kemas, tak nak cuci baju. hahahaha. sorry ah lahling. pilan pilan kayuh ah, wa veli shure wa boleh make a goot waif for u one. heh. ok. i think i've had enough. i wanna go study. *cheybok! macam paham siak!* ok dah dah. i'm not going to update for another eon so yeah. sorry dorry strawberry.

ps. i miss you very much lah, apek.

``Mat Jenin

2009-08-19T21:37:00.003+08:00

u talked to me in school just now. glad u did. because i guess the first fault was by u and its ur responsibility to clear ur stuffs with me. so around 5 mins ago i went to ur blog [for the second time in my entire life] to say thank u but then i saw ur tagboard. obviously u have friends who are just purely over reacting. i thought of replying to it but i guess that'll just pollute ur tagboard. so if u read this, do help me pass the msg to ur friends:

stop being childish girls. u do know it is ur friend who should come and confront me and not me going to her because as i've said before, i dont even KNOW she existed in school. so how am i supposed to look for someone whom i dont even know existed in the first place? persistency, people. if u are not persistent, it just so shows how much u care about the issue. sheesh. dont tell me u're not much smarter than that, girls. *winks*

oh and to one those.
dont try me. u soo dont know the meaning of outbitch-ing. =))

``Mat Jenin

2009-08-16T17:01:00.000+08:00

itu bakui, bakui, angkat bakui punyia, bakui itu.
ini bakui, BAGUT AHHHH!

tengok itu olang jialan macam babi hutan, muka pun silupa babi hutan.
aiya! itu mmg babi hutan nah!!!!!!

oak abe abe.

newcomers

2009-08-15T07:22:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.
this post is solely dedicated to one of my fellow schoolmates.
an amateur schoolmate who dedicates her latest post to me.

dear you.
i got to know about that like about 2 days ago. and i am wondering why u said u've heard A LOT about me and my mouth. hello miss. 'a lot' needs time. 2 days? nah. surely it wont be enough. i guess people have been saying things to you that even i dont know. whatever it is i just want you to know that i am so very not intimidated by you. what more you in my relationship matter. sheesh. i'm more experienced than you, my friend. and what's this about me judging you? you should be more concerned about how your friends judge you. and not me who dont even know that you existed in school. oh btw. i knew you've been stalking my blog so yeah. go ahead girl. stalk some more. i got ur bloglink from bloghopping only yesterday and unfortunately i was greeted by that post. great sight huh. everybody have got their own eye candy in school and i'm not surprised my bf was one of them. so dont make it look as if i'm the bitchy one here. relfect through your matured mind; you are the bitchy one. about screaming to my bf's face, i've got only 2 words for you: APA SIAK. these matters are very trivial you know. and i'm wondering why u are being so defensive in your post. anyway. u dont know me sister so you should be the one who should stop judging me. oh and a piece of advice: dont be too proud of your 2 years of relationship. people change. even boyfriends. =)

k dah. i'm done. korang2 yang tau hal ehwal saye ni sila2 lah pergi bloghopping. you will never know when someone will be bitching about you right smack in your face. and the best thing is you dont even know it! heh. i'll be meeting lahling in a couple more hours sebab saye very gian nak mandi laut! i've been indecisive about this due to torrential flood of assignments a have to do. but what the heck. i dont care. so EAST COAST HERE I COME! *jumps in my bathtub and starts splashing around*

to whom this post may concern.
jutaan ampun dan maaf seandainya saya terkasar bahasa di atas. ini adalah atas alasan2 yang munasabah. saya tak sangka ada orang yang menyampaikan sesuatu pada awak, yang tak pernah terlintas di fikiran saya. jadi kalau awak nampak saya di sekolah, sudi2 lah menegur sapa walaupun setelah awak membaca luahan hati saya di atas tu. kerana saya juga seperti awak; manusia yang mampu menyinggung perasaan orang lain tanpa disengajakan. =)

SAMBUNGAN

2009-08-09T22:16:00.004+08:00

oh. i forgot about this mambang's photos with me. coincidentally, his costume matched mine. and so we became the infamous retro pair for that day. [not that we werent infamous already. heh.]

ok go. i'm done here. =)

RETRO

2009-08-09T21:55:00.007+08:00

oak abe abe.

i now present to u all these pictures that were taken during National/Institute/BeYourself Day. heh. as u can see, the theme is retro and thus, the costumes. the tiring part was when we scampered all around bugis to find the shop. but the fun part is we managed to persuade people to join us and dress up as outrageously as well. teehee. amirah, rai'hanah, hafizah, hafiz, rahman, raj, candice, rizal, marcus, peng rong and me. =)) i am soooo super lazy to explain all the fun things i had going on in school that day. so i'll just let the pictures from fb to do the talking for me yah. hee. oh btw. i had so many eyes staring at me that day, and soo many people whom i've never noticed in school that came up to me to snap a pic. cool or what? hah. ok dah. baik aku stopp berbual. malas beb. sorry dorry strawberry. =P

``Mat Jenin

sick

2009-07-29T20:46:00.000+08:00

oak abe abe.
been down with fever and cough since monday. i was left with no energy to even stand up. highest temp was 39.8. sheesh. rabak kan. but we're left with no money to go to the doctor. so i self-treated myself with personal medications. lahling sent me home on monday and he cared for me till i fell asleep. awww. so sweet. *maceh* anyway. i'm feeling much better now. thanks to friends - amirah&hafizah who brought for me bubur. heh. cute sey korang. i'm feeling a lot better today. all energised to start the school day tmrw. so yeah. see u guys in school. chiows.

ps. when ur sick, u finally know who ur true friends are.

``Mat Jenin

racial harmony

2009-07-26T22:13:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe.

these are a few photos of me during racial harmony day.

kalau nak tengok yang lain tu, silalah cari sendiri di facebook ye.

malas nak upload uh.

sorry dorry strawberry.

heh. =P

``Mat Jenin

boyfriends and babies.

2009-07-24T21:38:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

this post is solely about me and my boyfriend.

oh. and a baby. heh.

...

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i love my boyfriend.

ooh. and i love babies.

hahaha.

ok. next post,

racial harmony day.

``Mat Jenin

2009-07-23T17:32:00.002+08:00

ATTENTION ATTENTION!

this is a request post.

ehem ehem.

Saya dengan sukacitanya mengisyhtiarkan bahawa zulkifli bin hassan telah pun menubuhkan sebuah blog.

myneighbourischinese.blogspot.com

heh.

ok. i'm done.

``Mat Jenin

2009-07-12T12:27:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe.

been waiting for lahling to send me pictures of what i've been up to these days.
so that at least i can post something up.
but apparently he's just too busy with his house chores.
so korang2 tahan je lah eh.
ok go.

ps. Yang. saye masih tak tau sey tengkorak ape tu. hmm.

``Mat Jenin

lovelovelovelove

2009-06-17T02:01:00.013+08:00

PU3 DESTRESSING PERIOD

dont ask.

this is my personal fav. i dont know why.

_____________________________________________________

SASTERA OUTING - CIKGU'S FAREWELL [17/06]

the next 2 pics are f***ing crappy.

i'll miss u cikgu. =(

yay! ARCADE!

straight + wavy = destruction. hoho.

``Mat Jenin

2009-06-11T15:27:00.001+08:00

i totally agree. *smiles*

``Mat Jenin

other happy moments - captured

2009-06-10T23:36:00.011+08:00

here are some photos, nice quality photos i mean, that i took from farah nab's facebook. she's the best photographer anyone could ever have. =)) -hiperbola ye tuan-tuan dan puan-puan. heh. so yeah. hope u guys enjoyed it! u can find the rest of the awesome photos on farah's, amirah's and my facebook. oh oh. and there are videos too. those that we all will remember. heh. laters people.

``Mat Jenin

30 Hour Famine Camp

2009-06-07T15:00:00.015+08:00

oak abe abe!
i'm back from the camp and i made it! i survived without food for 30 hours! oh i'm soo proud of myself and hopefully by now i would have lost some weight. =P anyway. a lot had happened during the camp itself but first let me introduce to u my family members, Khakaba from Lesotho.

Julian aka Mat Poser/MIA

Mariel aka Bored Minah

Hairil aka Bitch *roll eyes*

oh this is not my group member. i found him sitting by the handicapped toilet, with a shaver in his hand and smiling at everyone passing by him. his name is hawazi. huahuahua.

An Hui, my another family member.

Benjamin aka Slacker

Here's my facilitator, Yvette. so far, she's the coolest facil among others. =)

Alphonse - i hope i got ur name right. heh. he's filipino.

David. this guy is an indonesian. =)

Tata aka i-dont-understand. she's also from indonesia.

there are also a few others like serene and this tall chinese guy in which i cant recall his name. they are also part of the family. and soo after registering, i became the head of the family [because i registered first. wth.] and form there the journey of the this famine camp begins. on the first day, we experienced life just like in the 3rd world countries whereby we have to make decisions be it right or wrong. we had to work to earn money and trust me, it is not easy being the head of a family. my family members worked so hard such as farming where we had to pick minute green beans from bushes, office work, where we had to copy out a half-paged essay from the magazine and even prostitution. and in the end we earned so little. and to top it all of, Julian kept on going missing for like 3 times in a row right at the start of camp. irritating matrep. nevertheless we had fun. for me, it was a real eye opener because just experiencing a small part of the poor people's life in the under-developed nations already made me feel super agitated and exhausted. whatmore the people who are really experiencing it. at night, we had this 'interactive' session - or so they thought - with 2 HIV positive kids from cambodia. just by hearing their story, it made my heart shatter. so young yet so strong. they had to go through all the social stigma and perseptions that their nieghbours and relatives had about HIV infected people. it was so heart wrenching that it made me cry. yes, literally. i soo salute their courage, will, perseverence and strength to continue surviving.

before lights off, me amirah and zul decided to sneak for a bath because we were feeling so super sticky but in the end only me and zul showered. ey. we went to the indoor basketball stadium, where we were supposed to sleep, but it turned out to be the the whole freakingly big area were occupied by inconsiderate campers who just want the whole damn area for themselves. u know where the 3 of us ended up sleeping? at the canteen, beside the vending machine. lucky for us, there were 3 separate benches for us to sleep on. and guess what. as usual, amirah couldnt sleep. ape saje lah budak ni. me and zul were already painting sandcastles in our dreams and what is she doing? nothing. hahahahaha. ok lah. she did something lah. she looked at a weird guy cycling the canteen and the second floor at 3 am in the morning. and he wasnt one of us nor the facilitators. ghost? i dont think so. hee.

on the second day, we are supposed to collect old newpapers and clothes so that world vision can sell them off and channel all that profit to the children in these under developed nations. each family is in charge of 6 block and our location is situated at tampines. we split up, did our job and again we had fun. =) surprisingly, at some blocks, the response on these collections are so overwhelming that we decided not to carry on knocking on the other units of the block. for example, mariel. heheh.

see. most of these newspapers are what mariel collected. from one unit. alone. =P

and that irritating mat poser had porridge before coming to help us. oh wait. not help. join us. grr.

the last activity we had for the camp before breaking fast at downtown east was the country cheer competition. whichever country that has the best cheer will win an exclusive MTV lanyard and notebook per person. and that was what spurred me to go all out other than the fact that i got sabotaged by my own family members. hah! with my family's determination [cheydebah!] along with the rest of Lesotho-ians, we managed to win the competition! partly was because the lyrics were quite meaningful and that the last part was quite cute. =)

this is our family's maskot, Khakaba. - named by tata.

i soo love this country tag. =))

and a newly profound 'pet'. heh. u know i know.

later that evening all of the campers travelled to D'Marquee to have a closing ceremony graced by Ah Mei [who the hell is she??] a taiwanese pop star before breaking our fast with that packet of nasi lemak. though pathetic, it tasted wonderful. because why? because the children in africa never get to taste rice for every 30 hour that they starve. not even a small cup of clean water. so yeah. i learnt a lot from this camp. it made me more aware and empathetic about the crisis of poverty and HIV/AIDS all around the globe especially those concerning children. i hope to join this famine camp next year. however, without my khakaba-ians, i dont think that my stay during the camp will be as fruitful as of now. u guys really made my stay there enjoyable. i missed u guys. =)

[eh mat poser, u promised to go chalet right? make sure u plan hor. if not... *snarls*]

ohoh before i forget. this is the cheer that Lesotho made during the camp.

We are hungry but we like it,

we are tired, we wont fake it,

for the children we will make it.

I can. I will. Make a difference...

Lesotho lesotho lesotho [OOK OOK!]

Lesotho lesotho lesotho [Yeah....]

Lesotho lesotho lesotho [OOK OOK!]

Lesotho lesotho lesotho [Yeah...]

*everybody collapses to ground*

TOO HUNGRY....!

=))

``Mat Jenin

Zul's Surprise Birthday Bash

2009-06-02T23:10:00.042+08:00

oak abe abe!

today is my dear lahling's birthday, Zulkifli Bin Hassan and i'm proud to announce that he's 19 years old! at last he's older than me. heh. soo. yesterday, on the 1st of June, my friends and i along with his friends decided to surprise him with a birthday bash. i told him that we were going to go on a date. just the 2 of us but actually the plan was to bring him all around pasir ris and when the people were ready, i'd blindfold him to the specific destination. wanna know what happened? alright, i'm ready to go. let's see.

At 10am, i left my house and headed straight to amirah's house to leave the games' items and some of the utensils needed for the bash. hidayah told me not to wear anything fancy for the moment or wear any make up as she would wanna make me up later that day. hmm. ok. i didnt suspect anything at first but yeah. anyway. i was supposed to meet zul at 2pm but suddenly he called me at 1145am saying that he is already leaving his house to meet me. so the plan had to be pushed forward. at last i met him as early as 1230pm and i brought him around and around causeway point to kill time. ooh and i bought for him a present and a slice of cake - as a decoy - as we sat at kfc for a while.

we boarded the 168 bus heading towards bedok and initially i wanted to alight at the bus stop near IKEA. but i figured that i i did that, we are going to reach pasir ris much earlier as planned. so i brought him straight to bedok. we camwhored - again to kill time. heh. when we reached bedok we took the 168 yet again to travel back to that IKEA bus stop. and by the time we reached pasir ris, my business partners are all ready for us. oh. him i mean. =) and so i blindfolded him all the way from white sands to our final destination [cheydebah. dah macam cerita seram pulak.] - Pasir Ris Town Park. yessa. at last, we could say "SURPRISE!" when he opened his blindfold. i stood in between our friends with that yummy 'cookies and cream' cake we bought from sweet secrets. *smiles*i didnt manage to capture his surprised face on my cam but farah did. i'll upload that picture when i get it. anyway. he was freaking surprised and surprisingly, to my surprise, he didnt even suspect that there was going to be a surprise birthday surprise for him. hehehe. [cool pe penggunaan diksi saye. =P] so here are the pictures that i manage to capture throughout the day. we played surprise dress up, ice breaker games and because everybody who turned up were soo sporting, we ended up having loads of fun and laughters! guess what. we share the same monthsary. the 1st. aww.when dusk was sinking, amirah decided to stop the games and told me that i have to change to the dress that she brought for me and that i have to go to the toilet so that hidayah could make me up. konon2 nak surprisekan zul. so i just followed orders lah. afterall they helped a lot in this thing. after i was done with my so called make over they said that they're gonna blindfold me and bring me to meet zul and surprise him somewhere with my make up and dress and all. again, i just followed orders even though i just cant stop questioning aini about the whole thing. haha. sorry aini. =P

after a few moments of walking from i dont know where to i dont know where, they made me hold zul's hand while we are both blindfolded and by the count of 3 they opened our blindfold, revealing our eyes to a romantic fondue dinner, by the lake with candles all around. and not forgetting that whitney houston song - i will always love you - playing, somewhere. for goodness sake i was hell shocked! they actually planned for our monthsary surprise without even telling me. me n zul just stood there speechless. for a moment i thought zul was in it also. but wth. he wasnt. hee. man. u guys are uber sweet. i dont know how to thank u guys any more. it was so sweet and romantic that i never thought of going home. thanks again guys. i love u. =)) hell i look like morticia adams. heh.

in the end, all of us had a memorable and fun time that day. esp so for zul and me. i am so grateful to have u guys around me. u guys are always there for me during times of tears or joy. it was so thoughtful of u guys to do all these for us. thank u so much. i can never ask for anything more as a friend. oh wait. u guys mean more than just friends to me. i love you guys so much. and zul. thanks for that gift u gave me. it was wonderful. simply lovely. thank you guys and thank u zul for making my plan a success and for making that day the most memorable monthsary i ever had. thank you so much. *smiles*

``Mat Jenin

Saucony Passion Run

2009-05-31T20:00:00.007+08:00

oak abe abe.

i just came across amirah's facebook and i got these pictures from there. yep. its the saucony passion run during 22 and 23rd of may i think. outdated. i know. heh. anyway. here's for u readers, credits to amirah and her beloved camera. =))

macam refuge camp.

tidur kat bawah hut pun jadi lah.

as usual. zai spoils the moment.

and there he is again.

and there. ****lah zai.

i can tell u she was more than sleepy.

in the end, all was fun and memorable. =))

``Mat Jenin

here and there

2009-05-23T10:48:00.005+08:00

MIOO

oak abe abe.

ey. so long since i last updated. heh. lazy lah. lately i've been very busy with workload. MIOO are over and done with. that one burden off my chest. i have stepped down from my position in MCS. and now all i have to do is study study and study. i've been trying to catch up on most of my tutorials esp GP and MGT. and for goodness sake, my GP and Bahasa paper are coming up in 3 days' time. i am soo not prepared. and to top it all off, i skipped the make-up GP lecture yesterday. all because of...? yep. laziness. well, gone case lah nampaknye ye. hahaha. anyway, i've got volunteer work today for the saucony passion run at ECP. i'm hoping to have a great time with great girlfriends. =)) ok lah. off i go to do my GP.

``Mat Jenin

2009-05-02T16:24:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

yesterday was my monthsary. lahling wasnt a disappointment at all. went to east coast. we laughed and ate, laughed and ate. when the time was right, he mesmerised me with yet another set of romantic words, verse by verse. how sweet.

oh. and we spent the rest of the day throwing stones into the water. hee. i guess i won, ey dear? =) thanks for yesterday lahling. it was truly a memorable experience.

ps. now who says love has to be expensive and full of gifts?

``Mat Jenin

images

2009-04-19T22:08:00.009+08:00

oak abe abe.
some updates coming up in the form of pictures. =)

07A3 outing

excerpts of awang belanga

Radio interview at WARNA 94.2fm

my mcdonalds boy at taka.

``Mat Jenin

010409

2009-04-16T22:32:00.004+08:00

Berlalu sudah 6 purnama...

Yang

selama 6 purnama ini,

saya ingin mengucapkan,

terima kasih kerana

mengenalkan diri saya pada awak,

dari itu saya kenalkan sayang dan cinta saya pada awak,

seikhlasnya.

terima kasih kerana

berkongsi air mata,

berkongsi hilai tawa,

dan semuanya yang indah belaka.

terima kasih kerana

telah mengubah hidup saya,

mengenalkan saya pada kenyataan,

mengenalkan saya pada dunia luar ini,

mengenalkan saya pada Tuhan.

tanpa diri awak, tidak mungkin saya dapat mengenali ini semua.

terima kasih kerana

memahami isi hati saya,

mengambilnya, dan menyimpannya

dalam peti hati awak.

terima kasih kerana

telah membelai saya, dan

melentur ego saya,

dan ketika saya kehausan manja,

awak curahkan secangkir gurauan mesra.

terima kasih kerana

saya telah mengenali erti terima kasih

dalam sebuah perhubungan.

Yang

selama 6 purnama ini.

-Zulkifli.H

dates back in time.

2009-04-11T23:49:00.003+08:00

July, 08

Tidak dapat aku lupakan,
saat-saat manis bersamamu,
mendengar senandung suaramu,
menatap wajahmu yang ayu.

Lalu kisah ini ku jadikan puisi,
puisi bahagia antara aku dan dirimu.
Bahagiamu terukir senyuman,
bahagiaku melihat senyumanmu.

Namun setiap puisi ada pangkalnya,
yang mula pasti berakhir.
Sampai disini lembaran persahabatan ini,
kita buka lembaran yang baru.

Wahai pujaan, wahai Nur Izyan Razalee,
Sudikah kau menjadi kekasih ku?

-Zulkifli.H

just when i thought he was already perfect enough.

``Mat Jenin

wah wah wah

2009-03-31T14:19:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe.
i'm in the o hub currently. waiting for dear hafiz to finish his recording. well actually he's still contemplating whether he should go to the moe building to have his recording or should he just stay put here, print out the script, and record it at home before sending via email. my advice: just go to moe. and this bugger is totally being irritating. haiyo. anyway. i think he's going to moe. as i'm typing he's making up his mind.

...........................................

YES! he made up his mind. he'll go home and send it. so now, i can do my karangan. hee. oh well.

anyway. life has being going on pretty well for me. things are getting more and more unexpected. awang belanga is over adn gosh i saw someone whom i should see. but nevermind that. people from all walks of life are starting to talk to me all over again. not that its a bad thing but yeah. my realtionship is getting more and more interesting and i shall not disclose any parts of it here so as not to embarass me n my beloved lahling. *winks* start of a new week. end of procrastination. i better get my bum up and start to work my ass out again. i feel that ive been slacking again. like how i did in year 2. remember izyan? yes yes i remembered. hmm. so many outdated assignments that i need to hand up. well the first step to successfully submit all my assignments is to finish up whatever i have started from. first up : karangan. which is due today by 5 pm. shuts. ok lah. updates soon.

``Mat Jenin

bad day

2009-03-12T00:35:00.004+08:00

oak abe abe.

today is a freakishly suay day for me. i came late to school. i got mustard on my uniform. i had to wear that stupid ITE shirt in school for half of the day. someone spilled a glass full of iced chocolate drink on my school bag. i strained my voice during training. i spilled my chocolate ice blended on the same ITE shirt i was wearing on my way home. wahlau. and on top of that, i have got detention to serve. AND guess what. i forgot to sign out for detention just now. therefore i have to serve SUSPENSION tomorrow. good. very good. thanks eh. this is so super dreadful. i am gonna miss geography lecture tomorrow. damn it. macam nak gamble je pun ade sey. but if i do that and get caught, instead of serving one day suspension, i'm gonna have to serve a week's suspension. idiot. oh well. let's just get this over and done with shall we? one day and that's it. ochey. i'm off to call dear lahling now. more complaints coming right up. chiaos.

``Mat Jenin

garnet baybeh.

2009-03-07T23:43:00.004+08:00

oak abe abe!

yesterday was the release of my H1 results. alhamdulillah saye pass. hee. more than what i expected actually but yeah. saye betul2 bersyukur. mungkin rezeki saye. hmm. yesterday also marks the annual sports day we always had but the only difference is that this time they call it the Sports Fiesta. not bad actually. this year, suddenly i'm all patriotic. heh. let me just reiterate again, [for 3 years in a row] that i am soo proud to be in GARNET house! kekeke. once again the champions for this year! anyway, i participated in the Speed Walk and 4 x 100m relay. and goodness gracious we got gold for both. cool or what? this soo makes my last year in MI extra special [hopefully]. *smiles cheekily*

well. coming up on the 28 mar is Awang Belanga. so i think its gonna be a tight-fit to my schedule. i may not even have time to have proper meals. by the time i reach home is already 10 pm. this is what happens during the weekends nowadays.

uber tiredness >> sheer laziness to eat >> go to sleep >> wake up the next morning feeling SUPER hungry >> rush off for next training.

nevermind that though. its all for the sake of passion. cheydebah. sudah lah yan. ngada ngada sak. ochey. i'm done. i wanna go doze off. eh wait. i forgot. there's training tmrw. aw man. look at the time. it's 12.15am. damn.

``Mat Jenin

2009-03-05T14:00:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.

i'm here in the O-Hub checking and clearing all my emails. i wasnt planning to update this blog of mine due to sheer laziness but... i decided to after persistent pestering from my dear dear gf dayah. soo. this is for u. =) appreciate it hor! heh.

i got my sastera paper just about an hour ago. it wasnt what i expected, [i expected better results actually] but it was ok. my combined grades were lower than my targeted grades but nevertheless it was satisfactory. so long as it doesnt compromise my chances of staying is more than enough for me. well, that is of now lah. hmm. i also got back my management paper. this time i didnt expect to get the marks that i got. i met my target. at last. *smiles* in about half an hours time, i'm gonna go down to geography tutorial and only then i will get to know my geography results. pls pls pls. *mumbles with eyes tightly shut* oh well. whatever it is i am really hoping and wishing and praying that hafizah and hidayah are able to stay with me/us throughout this year. please tell me u guys made it through. oh speaking of which.

H1 RESULTS IS TOMORROW.

oh dang. die lah. my h1 maths. it is soo gobnna be the most suckiest results that i ever obtained throughout my entire education life. [well excluding my A maths results during sec 3 - 18/180] wahahaha. no lah. i dont wanna get all stressed up over this h1 results. its just the h1. not h2 what. haiya. kanchong kanchong for what. *winks and sticks out tongue* ochey. i think that is all for now. pray for all of us hor. anymore updates will be posted soon. ok go.

``Mat Jenin

back.

2009-02-28T22:52:00.007+08:00

oak abe abe!

weyheyhey.. its been ages since i touched this blog. hee. sorry about that mates. i was trying not to get distracted because it was the common test. one that determines my fate. *macam paham siak yan.* hahaha. anyway, common tests are over bebeh! i couldnt get more relieved than this. ok lah. maybe after awang belanga is over and done with but for now, i'm actually more contented than i have ever been throughout my whole 3 years in MI. i have a good feeling about his but i dont wanna assure myself as yet. u will never kinow what the results will turn out to be like.

ok. a lot has happened actually through this whole period when i was on hiatus. hmm let's see.

I passed my NAPHA test. and i clocked 14.30 for my 2.4 run. for someone my size, hell i'm proud. =)
I actually studied for all of my GP timed assignments. gosh. i never thought it would happen. heh.

On 13 Feb, Mishary turns 1. weeee~
Oh. I spent half of my V.Day at the NTU Open House. the other half, of course, i spent it with my dearest babydarling. and he was uber sweet that day. *kiss2*

During 21 Feb, Cg Ila signed me and Lahling up for the boogle competition. wth. i dont even know anything about this whole boogle thing. never heard of it, never knew about it. sheesh.
Then comes the all important COMMON TEST. generally, all the papers were tricky and difficult. haiya. die lorr yan. die.

yeah. i guess that's all i can remember. oh yes. people. if u wanna buy tickets for awang belanga please do call or msg me. $5 per tix bebeh. as usual. btw. i wanna wish a very happy birthday to hidayah golek and also to cikgu mardiana. heh. semoga Allah panjangkan umur awak berdua dan semoga awak berjaya mencapai cita2 awak. =) oh oh. happy monthsary babydarling. ur msg was so touching. i loved it. thanks very much. sayang awak sangat2. oh yah. sebelum saye lupa. saye ingin mengucapkan ribuan terima kasih kepada teman2 saye yang tersayang iaitu, along, angah dan alang kerana sudi untuk membimbing saye dalam pelajaran. tanpa awak semua, tak mungkin saye akan berpuas hati dengan usaha yang telah saye curahkan pada minggu lalu. terutama sekali pada angah. saye sayang awak semua. HUGS. ok random pictures.

during hidayah's birthday dinner.

along. busu. alang.

i swear this guy is super irritating.

me and amirah. mugging for management.

ok dah. tmrw i have training kat city hall. mak datuk. peh jauh. tapi takpe. mcs punye pasal saye sanggup. hee. ochey. till the next update. Zaassss~

``Mat Jenin

hiatus

2009-02-03T21:06:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!

heh. been busy with school work load. n i had no time to post stuff on my blog. heh. okies. now, fyi, officially, i want to block myself from this computer. block myself from the internet access. i wanna concentrate on my upcoming common test. *chey debah!* hahaha. so yeah. wish me luck hor people. *winks* anyway i wanna wish a very happy birthday to farzana - 31 Jan, hidayah - 1 Feb, Izudin - 3 Feb and also aina - 4 Feb. may God bless u people and shower u guys with all the love there is in the world. =)) oh oh. n happy monthsary to u too babyLahling. sayang awak. kiss2. otey ah. see u guys next eternity hor. goodbye. take care, dont take drug! =P

``Mat Jenin

JB

2009-01-25T23:45:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe.

im currently at JB. at my aunt's place. and i am so freaking bored. yeah i have a phone but what use is it if i dont have any connection? well at least i have internet access. anyway. i've not been spending time with lahling lately and its so freaking frustrating. yes i do have other important things to do like revising. ok fine. REVISING. but still. i do have to destress right? i'm not the 'go-all-the-way' kind of person. mesti mau releks ada betul? haiya. die ah. common test is just around the corner. and i'm SOO not prepared for it. too much things on my mind? well not quite. its just the typical procrastination. damn i have to kick this habit. it'll eat me up alive i tell u. hmms. been having some misunderstanding with lahling. one that does deserve attention. he's not used to it as yet i guess. i'm sorry. i was so mean. nevertheless, he never disappoints me. he always manage to clear the murks. thank you for that sms. if it wasnt for that, i'd still be here, as mad as ever. i swear i love u. =) well. there's a high possibility that i wont be back till tuesday. and there goes my date. again. haiyo. if i'm stranded a little while longer i'll go mad. wahahahahah! ok part tu bedek. ok dah. i wanna go kacau my daddy. i want him to wake up because when he does, he'll wake my mum up. and when my mum wakes up she's call out to all my other siblings. and when they all wake up, i can pester them to go home. hehehe. *inserts evil grin*

At 11.12pm;

sehari berjauhan, setahun rindunye.

saya sayang awak ngan little *. kiss2.

``Mat Jenin

school

2009-01-15T22:16:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.
its been quite a while since i last blogged ey. so sorry. been quite busy lately. trying to juggle mcs n its upcoming events, schoolwork, family, friends and of course dear lahling. sheesh. its quite a handful i should say. n its just the first week of school mind u. oh well. i've started school on a good note. finishing up my assignments and listening to tutorials [only when hafiz is not around. wahahaha.] yeah. whenever he's around, i can barely concentrate. idiot. =P anyway. i hope i can clear my common test. that's why i'm starting to work my ass out now. when people go home at 6, i'm still at the canteen trying to figure out and take note of what i manage to scribble down during lecture. hmms. changing to be a better woman. whatever sey yan. *rolls eyes* ok. cant talk much now, gotta rush for my mob assignment that's due tmrw. *mumbles* wait. dont tell me i'm not sleeping again. damn.

arh. force oi. force. - Zulkifli.H

``Mat Jenin

whatever it is.

2009-01-05T21:53:00.002+08:00

What if you had a baby with the last person you texted?
: hehe. yes please!

If your ex said they hate you, you say?
: "finally! i've been wanting to say that to u a long time ago!"

Name something you are doing tomorrow?
: Scripting at RP.

When was the last time you had Starbucks?
: erm. last year? wait. or is it last last year?

What are your favourite colour(s)?
: Pink!

Are you named after anyone?
: nope.

What were you to be called if you were a girl?
: Beyonce? =P heh. i am a girl dumb dumb.

Anything you want to ask someone?
: "is it so hard for u to admit it?"

What is on your bed right now?
: my sister, izzah.

Where were you last night at midnight?
: in front of the comp trying to fix my blog.

Who was the last person you gave your number to?
: Yue Han. oh u nadim-ians. grr.

What are you excited about?
: School. i guess.

Do you drink bottled water?
: yes sir. non-carbonated ones sir.

Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
: yes. i dare say i did.

Where is your phone?
: beside me.

LAST THING:

Movie
: gosh. i cant even rmb.

Phone Call
: Zulkifli.

CD Played
: WWE Vengeance.

Shower
: a few hours ago.

Time You Cried
: just now in the afternoon.

FOUR,
Have You's:

Dated Someone Twice
: yes.

Been Cheated On
: HELL YEAH.

Bought condoms
: hahaha. no.

Lost Someone
: uhuh.

THREE Things You Did In The Past Three Days:

Taken drugs
: No.

Got Drunk
: No.

Eaten Cheese
: err. mozzarella on pizza?

List THREE Things You Want To Do Before You Die:
1. SPEND TIME WITH MY LOVED ONES.
2. Enter UNIVERSITY.
3. Go to Bora-Bora Island.

TWO Confessions:

1. I love u hell loads, baby.
2. I've grown fat. idiot.

So Far in '08:

Laughed Until You cried
: yes. during pesta pantun. hahaha.

Who Is The Best Hugger You Know
: Anwar.

Do You Believe In Love At First Sight
: totally.

Is your bed against more than one of your walls?
: yes.

Have you ever been attracted to someone's parent?
: eiu. never.

Do you think you've changed over the past year?
: Yes. a lot. i mean a WHOLE LOT.

Do you currently have feelings for anybody?
: Definitely.

Would you ever kiss your best friend's boyfriend/girlfriend?
: how about if my bestfriend kissed my boyfriend?

Would you ever live with anyone on your top friends?
: i would.

Which do you like better, myspace or facebook?
: friendster.

Have you hugged anyone in the last 72 hours?
: yes. approx 4 hours ago.

Who can you blame for your mood today?
: my siblings. urgh.

Three days from now will you be in a relationship?
: heh. i am. and will still be 3 days from now.

What is something you wish you had?
: a good a level certificate?

Have you kissed any friends on your top friends?
: gee. ainie, can i consider u in? =P

Do you fall for people easily?
: nope.

Would you ever become a vegetarian?
: never. chicken rice rocks, bebeh.

Who was the last person you hugged?
: lahling.

What was the first thing you thought this morning?
: to reply to the sms-es that i didnt reply yday night. heh.

``Mat Jenin

<33

2009-01-05T21:41:00.003+08:00

BOY : wah. the 'missing-my-darling' virus is kicking in.

GIRL : *blushes* gee. now i'm infected with the 'i-cant-stop-smiling' virus. =))

``Mat Jenin

2009-01-04T22:14:00.003+08:00

i want my french tomato.

pretty please.

dear. dear.

2009-01-04T19:56:00.004+08:00

DESPO is not a nice word to use ey? fine then. i'll call u BITCH, u mothafucking liar. so, BITCH. tell me about your whole RAPE fairytale. i would love to hear about it.

ok dah. that's it about that despo. oh. i mean, BITCH. *rolls eyes* now for myself. i've been feeling a little not myself lately. more specifically i've been losing my head these days. i dont know why. is it the weather? no. is it the situation? na'ah. what a great way to headstart my year. thanks to that stupid despo. i mean, stupid BITCH. its been a 2 days sionce i last saw lahling. n damn i cant believe what i'm feeling. its as if i've not been seeing him for 2 years gitu. hahaha. eleh. baru2 je rase gitu. bile dah lama2, nak sms pun malas. muahahaha! tak lah. oh well, since the feeling just happens to be there, let's just savour it, shall we? LAHLING AH. I MISSED YOU LEI. HOW? hehh. well. school is starting soon and i'm soo not prepared. sheesh. i just hate growing up.
oak abe abe.

``Mat Jenin

goodbye 2008. hello 2009!

2009-01-01T13:41:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!

this is my 108th post ever since Jan 08. and this is my 1st post for jan 09. yay! heh. ok. 2008 ended nicely for me. thanks to NADIMians. sayang korang. =)) so much has happened this year. and i mean SOO much. from personal problems, to school problems, to love problems and friendship problems. its normal for me i guess. but i wish that 2009 will be a much better year for me, putting aside the fact that i am going to sit for my a levels this year. gosh. oh well.

anyway. some people made my 2008, a year i will never forget. HIM. && DOUBLE HIM. && SAYEMBARA - KHILAF. && NADIM. especially. thanks. i will never forget those moments. *smiles*

i also wanna say sorry to some people whom i think deserve it. TWIN SIS. DAYAH. ANWAR. AMIRA. and especially darling ZULKIFLI. u know what wrong i did to u guys. i'm sorry. it was just the spur of the moment.

twin, i've always been there for u. but u didnt noticed. dayah, dont always feel that ur at the losing end. i'm sorry if i dont spend time with u but i really want to make time to.
anwar, i've nothing more to say. i've lost so much by having to lose u. maybe we were not meant to be. not like what we used to be. 3 years is not easy. u know it.
amira, i've said sorry before and i'm saying it again. i'm sorry if i was the cause of everything. i felt what u felt before. but i know u'll get someone better in the future.
and ZUL. its so sweet of u to manage all my nonsense and put up with my mood swings and all. perhaps u r the treasure i've been looking for. i love u and i will try to change my ways to suit u. thanks for everything u gave me. and i'm sorry for those times i messed with u. i didnt mean to.

and to the rest of u. may 2009 bring u joy, happiness and success in all that u do. happy new year people! =)

``Mat Jenin

2008-12-31T19:15:00.004+08:00

oak abe abe!
good news. post mortem will be held this saturday as BB CSC. yessa! finally! heh. masa untuk melepaskan gian. haha. anyway. yday was super fun. i went on a date with darling dayah. well. supposedly it was a one on one date. but it turned out to be that i bumped into fellow Nadim-ians. they had an outing on that same day. heh. only one word. FUN. the first part was mendak. but as the sun starts to set, things get more interesting. haha. shall not further elaborate more on that shall we? and to those who were there, please. what ends there ends there hor. jangan pulak terbawak2 sampai ke dalam mimpi ke, realiti ke ok? hahahaha. siak ah mai. let's not get too excited here shall we? =P k lah. the day ended very nicely yday. i never got sesat. things were looking great. only that its been a while since i last spent time with dear lahling. hmm. nvm. we'll have our own date later on ok? =) oh. n i'm sooo super bored at home now. lahling went fishing, parents are out n i'm at home doing my script. oh well. let's get back to work now shall we? laters peoples.

``Mat Jenin

2008-12-29T18:10:00.002+08:00

OK. 3RD POST = BOREDNESS
this is just to say that BABY Mishary has got his first teeth! at last. after more than 10 months, he's finally gotten a first teeth! heh. i love u, Mishary. =) k dah. tu je. =P

``Mat Jenin

just when i thought.

2008-12-29T17:46:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe.
its been more than a week Nadim ended. but now i just realised. i have not gotten over it. yet. gosh. how i missed those trainings. how i missed those dances. how i missed those songs. just when i thought i was moving along fine. idiot. i hate this ya know. i hate the part where memories by memories start to flood your mind; the funny moments we get scolded for doing something stupid. the happy moments when we managed to sing everything in tune. the tough moments when people started to go sick one at a time. the angry moments when some people sabotaged the whole team and caused the whole team to flop. and especially. the sad moment when we put up our last show and everything ends. *sighs* how come this is so hard? it wasnt that hard before. god. i cant believe myself. i am not moving on. i am still browsing through the pictures and videos of nadim every night before i go to sleep. i am still waking up each and every day, anticipating that there will be training at rp. n i am still saying n singing my lines throughout the whole day, where ever i may be. damn. i need to be strong. i'll get out of my mind if i dont get over this whole 'nadim' thing. nadim-ians. u guys really created that lasting impact in my life. much more than anyone ever did. as yet. i missed u guys. i really do. ='(

``Mat Jenin

2008-12-29T14:12:00.002+08:00

aku tak boleh terima yang kau mencintai dia dan bukan aku.

dan aku masih tak boleh terima kenyataan itu hingga kini.

kenapa?

haruskah aku bertanya?

``Mat Jenin

2008-12-26T17:48:00.000+08:00

i hate you. i hate you. i hate you. i hate you.

I HATE YOU, idiot.

PERIOD.

2008-12-22T10:34:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe!
heh. hello people. i missed my blog. i missed blogging. and. i missed Nadim. yes. we had our last nadim performance yesterday. it was so touching. i felt super sad. after all those tireless training and intensive polishing, i knew it was going to be hard to end this. and it was. at the end of the show, i became more touched when the kids cried their hearts out because it was their last show day. see. if they can feel the lost why cant we? of course everyone else did. nevertheless i am proud of every one who made the performance a success. yes we get scolded. yes we complain. yes we make mistakes. but it was all for the better. i'll miss the bujangga dara. i'll miss the bujangga teruna. i'll miss my beloved MCHQ. i'll miss the budak-budak. i'll miss the orang gaujapuri. thanks you guys for making a difference in my life. this definitely does end my year well. =) ok. below is the video that i managed to record. from yesterday's news. luckily i reached home just in time to record. i guess at that point of time everyone else is still at victoria theatre helping the set crew. hurhur.

pictures from nadim will be uploaded to my friendster. NADIM-ians, if u want those pictures just leave me ur email and i'll send it to u. k people. more updates later.

ZASSS!

``Mat Jenin

2008-12-11T10:03:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!
hello ppl of the world. i am happy to announce that orders for the tickets can start coming in now. so do visit our WEBSITE or inform me to book ur tickets. please come down and support us. we will promise u our best performance. =)

much love, crew bisikan nadim 08.

2008-12-08T11:14:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!
slmt hari raya aidiladha kepada semua kaum muslimin yang menyambutnye. hee.
sebenar2 nye saye sedang boring di sini. jadi mule lah ke-merepek-an saye ni ye. heh. pertama tama saye ingin menyampaikan dedikasi ini kepada Yang Berbahagia Encik Zulkifli Hassan. ini kerana dia membuat saye menjadi mabuk kepayang dengan tidak berjumpa saye selama beberape jam ye, tuan-tuan dan puan puan.. beberape jam.

haiya! lahling ah! saye rinduuuu sangat kat awak.. tolong lerr angkat telefon.. saye tau awak msaih tengah tido tapi saye peduli ape. angkat telefon horr. heh. =P

ok dah. btw people. datang lah tengok bisikan nadim pada 20 dan 21 dec ye. nak ticket? call/msg saye. setidak-tidaknye orang2 yang ade berkenaan dgn pementasan ini. terima kasih!

``Mat Jenin

random update

2008-12-05T18:31:00.004+08:00

oak abe abe! here's a video of this baby boy. to tell u the truth, its magical how i've seen him grow up for the past months. gee. hurhur. aniwae. not much updates actually. only one word can best describe me now. NADIM. yeah. thats all.

now here's a video of lahling. i told u about the hot seat activity before right? well here it is. at last. they managed to hit lahling's soft spot and made him cry. yaay! hee. well. on the other hand, i feel super sad when he had to open up about what we thought was his oh-so-boring life. [and girl. if ur reading take a good look at this video and tell me what u think.] to lahling. dont worry about anything. i trust u and i believe in u. that's all that matters now right? =) *ps. u r super sweet that day. thanks baby.*

``Mat Jenin

updates

2008-11-30T10:50:00.002+08:00

OAK ABE ABE!
HELLOOOO PEOPLE OF THE WORLDS!

i've not be updating lately ey. its actually because i went to camp. and i came home yesterday. hurhur. and i only have one thing to say. it was superb! it was SUPER fun, SUPER tough, SUPER gruelling and SUPER exhausting. too much happened until i dont know where to start. hmm. let's just highlight the main events during the camp hor. the most sucky experience is the first activity of the camp. fallback. someone has to fall back on the canvas that the rest of us are holding while standing up on the bench's table. why i call it sucky? because i let lahling fall. yes. i let him fall. when he fell back i didnt manage to hold on to the canvas because apparently he was too heavy. ok lah. he's not heavy. its only that i didnt grab the canvas tightly enough. haiya. that incident changed my mood for the rest of the day. i stopped trusting myself and i wouldnt let anyone else trust me. lahling. soly hor. wa tala singaja. veli soly hor. oh yes. another MAJOR activity i had to go through is the hot seat. i have to reveal and defend myself towards the facts and lies they bombard at me. too bad for me, they managed to hit my weak spot. hint. about my relationship with lahling now and before. idiot.

ok. next memorable experience is the combat game. because of this game every single one of the campers had to suffer at least a minor cut or ache. for my group, SUTRAPONS, we had to duck all the way across the carpark, tiptoe to the next flagged pole, leopard crawl all the way from one end of the beach to the other, by the shore, and then roll from the starting the the mud patch top the other. rule of the game? dont let the other team or the facilitators see u. yes it is FUN. but GRUELLING as well. hah. i endured man! wohoo. achievement or what. haha. there were also other activities such as the 4 pointer game. which hafiz took part in, in replacement of zahidah.

alah. too many things lah. and i'm SUPER lazy to type. haha. overall. camp was superb. again i say. superb. siape2 yang tak datang tu, rugi OIII. anyway. right after camp yesterday i had to follow lahling to put back all his stuff at home or other ppl's home. and of which leaves me no time to go back to my house before heading off to nadim at RP. hmm. yeah. that's it i guess. haha. oh oh. i got to know RAIHANNAH is actually taking part in nadim. COOL OR WHAT? haha. yessa. boleh bully. =P ok dah. that's it for now. i wanna go siap for nadim later.

dear lahling. thanks. whatever u tried to do really assured me that u are trying ur best. i know. thanks again. i love u. =)

``Mat Jenin

2008-11-25T11:25:00.004+08:00

oak abe abe!
haiya haiya haiya. last minute note ah. NADIM AT 3 AH. RP AH. HAIYA. GILA LAH TU. otey ah ppl. no updates hor. post ini hanya untuk sekadar release tension. kuang kuang kuang. kekeke. zassss ppl.

``Mat Jenin

Singapore Flyer

2008-11-24T12:21:00.007+08:00

oak abe abe!
my last few days were superb. my nadim character is finally finalised and moving. i've started studying geog. n yesterday i went on the SINGAPORE FLYER baby. yessa. at last. haha. the view was unnaturally breathtaking. now i believe it when they say u can see Indonesia from wayyy up there. oh yeah. i went on the SF with my beloved family. hee. then after this we went to bedok corner to eat before heading home. wow. maam dah lama gitu tak keluar as one whole BIG family. huhu. well. let's just let the pictures do the taking shall we?

[edit]

haiya. sorry ah. something wrong with my blogger. and it made me lazy to upload more. so if i have time i'll upload in the next post hor. =)
oh yes. btw. i lost my hp. well. i kinda left it somewhere but nevermind that. so please. if u wanna contact me, sms me thru my old number. the one u guys had before this. and when i get my new number, i'll msg u guys hor. esp to all my 'ahli-kembang-lidah', [hahahaha. siak ah hayati.] please msg me about anything u have to clarify. i feel lost kalau korang tak msg saye. macam takde hala tuju gitu. hurhur. oak abe abe. to be continued...

``Mat Jenin

credits to Muney

2008-11-20T10:25:00.003+08:00

1) Explain your relationship status:
- Attached. && loving it.
.
2) Name a lyric from the last song you listened to:
- "for all the times you stood by me, for all the truth that you made me see....." =)
.
3) What did you wear today?
- clothes?
.
4) Do you wear contact lenses or glasses?
- contact lenses.
.
5) How many windows are open on your computer?
- one.
.
6) What are you doing after this?
- going out for nadim training.
.
7) Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?
- LANGKAWI. hee.
.
8) Do you like to cuddle?
- VERY much.
.
9) Which one of your cousins is closest to you in age?
- Illyana. gosh. now that u've mentioned it, i just noticed. its been more than a year since i last saw her. gee.
.
10) Do you like someone? Does his/her name start with A, B, D, K, M, C, or J?
- yes. his name starts with T. and then A. and then U and then F and then I and then ........
.
11) Do you like hugs?
- YES!
.
12) Are you a loud person?
- err. no? ok bedek. a bit lah.
.
13)Are you wearing underwear right now?
- uhuh. like duh.

.
14) Look to your left, what do you see?
- the mirror. damn i'm selekeh now.
.
15) What is one thing you would love to happen tomorrow?
- get Awang Belanga's admin settled.
.
16) Would your parents be mad if you came home smashed?
- hmm. based on experience, i guess so.
.
17) Have you ever had a crush on your siblings friend?
- i think so. hee.
.
18) Does it matter to you if your bf/gf smokes?
- yes it does matter. a lot. but luckily he doesnt. =))

.
19) Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
- err. i dont know. but i really do hope so.
.
20) Is there a guy/girl that knows everything or mostly every thing about you?
- My twin sister. my ex.
.
21) Who was that last person you had a phone call longer than 7 minutes?
- my french tomato. huhu.
.
22) How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking?
- Rarely. its bad i know.
.
23) Last serious hug?
- last week. saturday night. i remembered. heh.
.
24) Would you ever dye your hair blonde?
- NOOOO! ugly or what sey.
.
25) Is something bothering you?
- yes. the weather.
.
26) Has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?
- ooh. yes yes. my french tomato. my ex.
.
27) Do you believe that you can change for someone?
- that is if that person would want to change for me.
.
28) What time you wake up this morning?
- 6 am. what the heck was i thinking?

.
29) Would you go back in time to change something?
- this is the one thing i want and wish for every single day.
.
30) Is it hard leaving people behind?
- yes. it is. esp if that someone leaves something behind.
.
31) What are you excited for?
- NADIM!
.
32) Who was the last missed call?
- Hayati. sorry babe. i cant go today.
.
33) At the moment are you more warm or cold?
- Warm.
.
34) What was the last thing you spent your money on?
- HONEY MILK TEA!
.
35) Is there one song that reminds you of the whole summer?
- yep. the songs on this blog of mine.
.
36) What are you doing right now?
- typing. haha.
.
37) Can you handle the truth?
- Yes.
.
38) How's your life lately?
- heavy duty. *ish. dah macam Energizer battery gitu.*
.
39) When's the last time you did something you knew was wrong?
- i dont know. but it was esp so last year.
.
40) If the year consisted of only one season, which would you choose?
- Spring. i love flowers. =)
.
41) Do you hate being alone?
- NO. NEVER.
.
42) Where were you last night?
- first half of the night, i was with my french tomato. another half of the night, i was at home. script-ing.
.
43) Last non-alcoholic beverage consumed?
- plain water.

.
44) Do you currently have a hickey?
- Nope.
.
45) Think back to the last person you held hands with, would you kiss them?
- oh oh yes please!
.
46) When did you first get Myspace?
- i dont even have it now. haha.

.
47) Are you drifting away from any friends?
- i am drifting away from hafiz n handry. oh no.
.
48) What are you listening to?
- the sounds of my siblings quarelling. sheesh.
.
49)Does the last person who put their arm around you mean anything to you?
- a lot.
.
50) Are you comfortable with answering personal questions?
- Yes. well actually. it depends, ya know.
.
51) Ever kissed someone who smokes?
- Yes. do i regret it? yes.
.
52) Someone on your mind right now?
- yes. u know who.

.
53) Who was the last person to sit on your bed?
- Ismah.
.
54) Where were you at 2:02 this morning?
- home. i told u i was sleeping didnt i?

.
55) Did you go to sleep last night smiling?
- haha. yes.
.
56) Anyone told you a secret this week?
- just yesterday.
.
57) When was the last time you bought something?
- yesterday. HONEY MILK TEA!

``Mat Jenin

that 9 month old baby

2008-11-17T18:00:00.004+08:00

haiya. nowadays u have to pardon me for being super random. for example, now. haha. mishary's sick. high fever. at first i thought it was bad. but later on i got to know that his high fever is due to the fact that he's gonna grow his first baby teeth. aww. so cute. like me. hee. =P ok dah. itu aje yang saye nak update. hurhur. pathetic kan? oh well. whatever. hee!

``Mat Jenin

2008-11-16T22:44:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe.
this past week has been the usual. except for some downfallS of somethingS. hmm. shall not elaborate more on that. anyway. now i'm busy with drama trainings. AB and BN. but lucky for me they are not very intensive. phew. up till now. i havent even started to get going in terms of my studies. i dont know why but its just me. i cant bring myself to take out those bulky booklets of theories and study them. maybe the lack of support from my super expert frens i think. nevermind that. i think i'll be able to start by this week. i hope. heh. ok lah. nanti if i got something else to update, i'll update hor. =)
ps. i miss my french tomato.

``Mat Jenin

random

2008-11-10T15:50:00.004+08:00

OAK ABE ABE!
haha. hello people. ok a couple of random issues. up till today. around 20 people have called me up and said, "ey. aku nmpk benua tadi" or maybe "yan! tadi aku bump into anwar dgn gf dier!" there were a lot of other comments. *which were super hilarious. hee.* k lah people. i tell u something. so long as ur in woodlands, u will definitely have a 99% chance of seeing him and/or her. so brace yourselves people! brace yourselves! haha. ape siak tu. hurhur. aniwae. that aside. here's video of me. along with hafiz's voice. omg lah. i cant believe i actually did this. so much for feminity. grr. enjoy laughing eh korang. hee. oh sorry. u have to tilt ur head a bit to see this. =P

hmm let's see. ape lagi eh? well today apparently i'm not going out. cuz i'm SUPER lazy. but tmrw. i guess i'll be going out to pasir ris with them peeps. outing. hmm but dear Lahling cant follow. =( but nevermind. i know i'll have fun. kan kan kan? teehee. ok dah. i'm actually on the phone now. with Lahling. hurhur. till next time people. =)

``Mat Jenin

hee.

2008-11-09T10:52:00.003+08:00

dear lahling.

yesterday was sweet. it was a memorable moment that i'll cherish for the rest of my life. thank you so much.
i love you. i swear. =)

``Mat Jenin

ECP

2008-11-07T00:24:00.008+08:00

oak abe abe!

today was super fun! hee. me, amirah, dayah, hafiz handry n hafizah went to ECP. to destress i guess. esp when our H1s are over. hee. let's say that again. esp when our H1s are over. haha. i like the sound of that. hee. yep2. we went there and the first thing we did is... stone. hah. stone. tu lah dier. masing2 ade masalah sendiri. masing2 perlukan masa dan ruang sendiri untuk berfikir dengan tenang. it was a good time to do that. n so we did. after that i got to know that Lahling was otw there from changi. so we kirim-ed food. haha. sorry hor lahling. wa i-pi-li-si-ate lu punyia saclifice. hehe. and so. we cam whored every single sec. stone again. cam whored again. and stone again. until me n handry decided to take a dip in the water. n wow. it was nice. haha. since i didnt plan on going for a swim, i didnt bring my spare clothes. in the end i had to wear amirah's spare clothes which i dont know why she brought it for in the first place. =P. n guess what. hafiz laughed at me. he freaking laughed his head off when he saw me in amirah's clothes. *or shorts i suppose?* grr. tk guna nye anak. haiya. =) so yeah. we waited for more than 3 hrs for our food to arrive. we ate n when its dark, we decided to go home. and of course. i went home with Lahling. yay! *jumps up and down* hee. some photos down here. enjoy. oh oh btw. can we please have more of these outings? it was fun n super destressing. =))

ps. madly. deeply. truly. =)

``Mat Jenin

2008-11-05T14:46:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!

yessa! i am DONE with maths! yes yes yes! that's it for the year man. no more PW. no more maths. no more H1. hee. next up. Awang Belanga 09. huhu. i am soo excited. despite the fact that we had many hiccups, the fire in me still burns. uhuh. the passion for MCS is still in me baby. hee. oh yes. btw. i put up a new tagboard for my beloved FRIENDS and FAMILY to tag. and not my SUPER FANATIC FANS. so if u, my fans, are thinking of doing so, please think twice. =) ok done. till the next post. ZASSSSS!

``Mat Jenin

2008-11-02T23:22:00.002+08:00

---------------OCTOBER BABY -------------------
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves
to takes things at the center. Inner and physical
beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry
often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and
fearless. Always making friends.. Easily hurt but
recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does
not care to control emotions. Unpredictable.
Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND
sexiest of them all.

random. i know. haha. =P actually i just wanna say out something that i've been wanting to say for quite sometime now. *coughs* "MATHS AH MATHS. HAIYA! DIE AH DIE!" haha. ok dah. i'm too stressed out i guess. on second thought.. no lah. too worked up. sheesh. just 2 more days Izyan. just 2 more days. come on. u can do it. force oi. hee. i cant wait to go to school tmrw. cuz i miss you. hurhur. =)

oh btw. NIZAR gave me a new title in mcs. BOSSY QUEEN. yes people. he said i'm a BOSSY VP. gee. now u can call me Jenin The Bossy Queen. haha. thanks eh nizar for giving ur mum all the wrong info. u messed with the wrong people. hah. u r soo gonna get it right in ur face. k lah. i (or rather, WE) will settle with u in school. =) nites peeps.

oak abe abe!

back

2008-11-02T11:45:00.002+08:00

sorry its been a long time since i put my blog to private. its been a hell of a time with some jealous freaks who just cant seem to settle down with the fact that i've moved on without em. but nevermind. aniwae. i'm done with my OP. my maths is in a 2 days time. my IR is due tmrw. wth. haiya. so many things. so little time. as usual. grr. now i'm doing my maths. n i'm telling u that actually, nothing is going inside my head. i wonder why. hmm. so yeah. oh oh. sorry i had to remove my tagboard because it seems that its becoming more n more popular with my fans who r so dedicated to keep track n comment on every minor things in my life. other than that there r also hardcore fans who just love to 'bring the house down'. so to my fans out there, happy 'reading WITHOUT commenting' on my blog.
OAK ABE ABE!

ps. dear lahling. that place was simply wonderful. thanks.
SAYE SAYANG AWAK.

``Mat Jenin

ooh la la~

2008-10-24T12:34:00.004+08:00

ooh. i sense tint of jealousy around me now. somebody is obviously NOT happy with the way i am now. hah. i know. ur talking abt me. hmm let's see now. when was the last time that i bitched about u? err. july? august? yeah. so why the sudden burst? hmph. maybe things between u guys arent that good, or perhaps u guys sparked a little fight and both agreed on pushing the blame on me? i dont know. AND I DONT CARE. hello missy. get ur facts right first before attempting to blast at me for no apparrent reason ok. u soo dont know what he does behind u. get this right, i know him far better than u do. one thing's for sure, i did NOT contact ur BF. i did NOT bother ur BF. i NEVER ever want him back in my life again. make sure u get that inside that little head of his. if u want to know, which i guess u already do, he is the one contacting me for you-know-what reason ok. the only thing that makes me want to continue entertaining him is because of SYMPATHY. and not LOVE. like hello? its soo long over between us alright. there, there honeypie. dont get too paranoid now. i know u feel SUPER conscious due to the fact that u wouldnt want to lose him again. i know. i never wanna do that. i believe his choices are based on reasons that only he knows. i never said he never loved u. i believe he does. so what's the problem now? if u think i'm really a big threat to ur current relationship why arent u coming up to me and say it? maybe i dont realise what i'm doing. oh wait. in the first place, what exactly did i do? huh? that's for u to know and for me to find out. the thing is i dont want to find out. so i dont see any reason for u to blast at me for no logical reason or explaination, as if i know this whole love story of urs. n to u Mr Lover. i am waaaay OVER u. was i the one begging u asking u to take me back? was i the one who wanted tolet go of this relationship? no. a big fat NO alrite. excuse me mister. i made my way through until now WITHOUT u ok. 5 months without u back then. n i survived. so dont make it look as if ur one big hell of a man that supports the foundation of my life because u never did. 3 years of relationship is not easy and u fucking know that. i managed to stay strong and i am proud of it. n until now i am still standing and proud to be where i am now even though i've been through hell before in my last few moments of relationship with u. just when i thought everything was over. u proved me wrong. both u and ur gf. come on lah girl. stop pin pointing others. in the first place how can i ruin ur relationship if i dont even keep in contact with anyone of u? stupid. just remember this. i am happy with the life i have now. i have HIM. i have my love. i have my friends. i have MY FAMILY. n i dont need anything more. not even a wince of sympathy or attention from u or ur bf. ur still not over me yet arent u dear Mr Lover? it was u who tagged me. i know. u wanna know how i know? because nobody says 'i love you' to me the way u do. i dont stick with u for 3 years n learn nothing ok. just one piece of advice that i gave u last time. n i hope u still rmb it till now. follow ur heart. cuz it always tells u to do the right thing that can make u happy till whenever. n whatever happens in ur relationship never ever put the blame on me or HIM because we were never involved in the shits that were hurled at u. oh yes btw. did i mention that i am SUPER happy with my relationship with my dear Lahling now? i did? good. because i just need u to remember that. the more u guys do this, the more intense ur relationship gets, the more happier i am with Lahling because i know he loves me more than u ever did. now what i want u guys to do is to stay on the low, do ur own private things and DONT bother my life again ok. not even for ANY reason u find logical. alrite? ok now go. shush. just go and play somewhere far from me.

oh yes. and btw. if u think that little warning of urs is gonna tick me off, u r soo wrong girl. i am not born to be barbaric. i repeat. BARBARIC. now that's what i call pure shitheads.

oak abe abe!

``Mat Jenin

2008-10-23T21:26:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!

haiya. PW PW PW. crazy freak. now no more PW for the moment ok. i wanna destress. hee. i wanna talk about ME. heehee. macam paham pe yan. no lah. i got nothing to do actually. *no actually i do have something to do. MATHS.* ah. buat bodoh kambing. i had a chat wtih twin sis just now. been so long i never talked to her. i missed her SUPER very much. n i got to know some stuffs. i'm just glad that it came from her and not anybody else. gerl. no matter what i will believe you. i never doubted ur friendship. dont worry about me. i'm fine. n i still love you like before. =) dear you. thanks for that FK moment. it was simply sweet of u. hee.

alrite babe. now i wanna go makan. very hungry already. den must sit down and do... MATHS. oh god. help me. please. sheesh.

ps. eh krg2 nak gi night safari tak?

kite gi halloween night dier. jom ah. hee!

``Mat Jenin

outdated

2008-10-22T23:49:00.004+08:00

oak abe abe! HEE. ok lah. ni lah dia gmbr2 tu. sikit2 je k. got too many pictures too upload so i guess i'll just randomly select some and post it up. i'll upload the rest in my friendster profile yah. enjoyz! =P

``Mat Jenin

2008-10-21T20:16:00.002+08:00

hee. i'm in PW class now. oh i just love my PW members!
CRYSTAL. HANDRY. GARLENG. NISHANTI.
I LOVE YOU GUYS A LOT!
STAY STRONG PPL! WE CAN DO IT!
I BELIEVE IN YOU GUYS OK?
muacks. =))

oak abe abe!

``Mat Jenin

2nd post

2008-10-19T19:32:00.003+08:00

[01] Do you ever wonder what your last ex is up to?
; Yes. sometimes when i start to daydream.

[02] have u ever been given roses?
; Yes. by Ridaudin.

[03] What is your all-time favorite
romance movie?
; Mohabbatein. TITANIC.

[04] How many times have you honestly
fallen deeply in love?
; Once. including this one, twice. =)
[05] Do you believe that everyone has their soulmate?
; uhuh. definitely.

[06] What's your current problem?
; he's not comfortable with, AS YET.

07] Have you ever had your heart broken?
; Yep. loads of times.

[08] Had a Long Distance Relationship?
; once. and it doesnt work out. so i dont believe in it.

[09] Do you believe in this saying-
ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER?
; now? no. last time? yes.

[10] Do you want to get married?
; Yes yes yes please! =D

[11] How many kids do you want to have?
; FIVE. or more? hee.

[12] What're your favorite colors?
; Hot Pink. Lime Green

[13] Who was the last person you held
hands with?
; Zulkifli.

[14] Do you believe in love at first
sight?
; Totally.

[16] At what age did you start noticing the opposite gender?
; When i was in Primary 4.

[17] Do you still like your ex?
; like? yes. love? i prefer not to disclose.

[18] Do you know someone who likes you?
; err.. i guess?

[19] Do you like anyone?
; i like a lot of ppl. hurhur.

[20] Do they know you like/love them?
; i think so. except for Taufik Batisah. =P

[21] Would you kiss someone?
; Only if i truly love that someone.

(22) Whats your status?
; ATTACHED. && LOVING IT.

``Mat Jenin

haiya

2008-10-19T11:46:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe!
haiya haiya. so long nvr update. haha. been very bz lately. particularly with PW. thank god. my pw drama has ended. n it was indeed a success. thanks to the cast : ATIKA, Zul, Fafa n Handry. i love u guys so much. without u guys i dont know how my PW group's drama wil turn out. =)) ok let's see. woah. too many things to say lah. so many things have been going on. too many pictures to upload. tk tergh-larghat dhen nok upload ni ha... *ape sey tu?* haha. whatever. ok just bits here n there lah k.

on 6th oct my beloved frens had a bdae surprise for me. it was 'wonderful'. keke. so many 'nicee' bdae presents. but the best part was, my MBF wrote n sang a song specially for me. aww. so sweet. sayang kau lah abang kurps. =P

on the 11 oct as i posted, we sastera mates went for a raya outing it was SUPER fun. no hassle. it was simply enjoyable. thnx eh ppl. u really made the day the most memorable outing ever.

on the 15 oct. we got our promotional status. alhamdulillah. i managed to pull thru. to those of u who have to leave us i just wanna say that this is not the end of the world. maybe there are better opportunities for u ppl out there. maybe u'll be more successful then us MIllennias one day. who knows? =) oh yes. this day is ZEE MOST special day because we managed to get my MBF to go up on stage n dance! hah! how exactly we do that? we sabotaged him! keke. cute or what sia? =)) wanna watch? go to youtube. USOP MILLENNIA. hee. opps. =O

on the 17 oct my PW grp carried out their drama skit abt maid abuse. it was a success as i;'ve mentioned. thnx to my talented cast. i dont know what to do without u guys. n to atika. so sorry that u got hurt in the process. hee. that's what we call hardiness and determination. =))

yesteday. my PW grp n amirah's PW grp went to rp to finish up our OP slides. from morning till night. we did our work. we gossipped. we flared. it was fun. so much things i didnt know. esp abt YOU. Ms A.Y. hmm.

i guess i'm done. i'm supposed to do something else but instead i sat in front of this computer blogging. wth. haha. ok lah. i gtg. see u guys somewhere someday sometime. soon. hee. OAK ABE ABE!

ps. thnx atika. for the info u gave me.
it really helped. now i know who's 'polluter'.
dasar betina.
hurhur.

``Mat Jenin

raya outing

2008-10-12T10:58:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!
yday was SUPER DE DUPER fun! i went on a raya outing with my sastera peeps *along with their ehems* and i can tell u its the best and syncronised raya outing i've ever been to. everybody were so colourful. hee. we went to a total of 8 houses in total approx. we took arnd 12 hrs i think? haha. went to hidayah golek's hse and she gave a surprise bday cake to her ehem. aww. so sweet. den we went to cg's house den hafiz usop den fandy den me den amirah den hafiz rawal den fuad and lastly hayati. haha. ok let's count. ok sorry. ada 9 hse total. haha. i tell u amirah's hse was the most memorable hse i went to. she's got a SUPER cute ragdoll cat! so fluffy so CUTE! the best part is, my MATHSBF is afraid of cats. haha. u put someone who is afraid of cats in a hse with a cat and what happens? shit happens. hahaha. he went to the extend of clinging on top of handry when the cat is running arnd the house. buruk ke pe sop? haha. hafiz rawal's hse on the other hand reminded me of alice in wonderland. the whole hse was so... Disney. hahaha. seriously. if we had the time i would really had wanted to stay for longer. but yeah. its the time factor.

at the end of the day, we went headed to our last stop at Eunos, rumah hayati, paid the bus driver since we wont be uising his services anymore for the day. everything arnd that area was so classic except for the fact that all over the place were scuttering cockroaches. yes i said COCKROACHES. my frens walked straight to the lift but i zig-zagged all the way trying to avoid the sight of those filthy creatures. what do u expect? lipas siak. geli ke pe. den at 1140 we left hayati's hse n headed for eunos mrt BUT it turns out to be we missed the last train. damn. we thought of taking the 67 bus to cck mrt but it already ended at the eunos bus int. so we had to go to the opposite direction outside of the int. the most silliest thing is. hafiz made us run in heels! wth. particularly amirah n me. we're wearing heels of how many inches n we ran! style ke pe. haha. skali we got to know that we chased after the wrong bus. siak ah fiz. grr. he's gonna pay for what he did to my heels. i mean OUR heels. haha. in the end we went our separate ways. hafiz amirah zul n me took 67 to cck and the rest took 61 to bb. despite all the hiccups of yday's outing, i never felt happier. maybe due to the fact that missed raya outing so much, or becuz i get to spend more than 12 hrs with lahling. hee. sorry no pictures cuz my dear amirah havnt gotten the chance to upload it as yet. so yeah. i'll upload it as soon as she send it to me yah? btw. I LOVE U GUYS. THANKS FOR MAKING ME FEEL SUPER HAPPY. YDAY WILL BE A DAY THAT I WILL ALWAYS CHERISH. I LOOK FORWARD TO SEEING U GUYS AGAIN. lovees~ ok done. gotta rush. going to seranggon plaza today. PW matters. sheesh.

oak abe abe! hee.

btw. lahling look awesome. mcm extra cute gitu kn.
and to my MATHSBF. u looked SUPER hot. sayang kau sgt2. =))

``Mat Jenin

2008-10-10T09:31:00.002+08:00

let me repost whatever i blogged abt.

Friday, September 19, 2008
currently i'm in school. just finished my sastera paper just now. it was f*cking hard. i swear. ok dah. no hope already. to all my year ones i think i'll meet u guys next year yah. =)). ok now for the serious part.i just saw her blog just now. n now i am feelin SUPER bad. SUPER guilty. i dont know why. i think because i'm in the wrong i guess? hello. yan. like OBVIOUSLY u're in the wrong. then who else? him? no right? gosh. i swear i never felt this way before. its like u're trampling on someone's dreams just to get on top of urs. f*ck lah kn. dah lah yan. u r SUPER bitchy siak. come on. dont be SUPER selfish. think of others can? for once lah yan. THINK OF OTHERS.ok dah. i'm tired. tired of all this SHIT. i've had enough. i dont care animore. i wanna stop thinking abt stupid shits alreadi. SUPER stupid shits.
period.

Thursday, September 18, 2008
i feel bad. very very bad. am i doing the right thing? am i doing something that i am NOT supposed to do? why is everybody asking me so much qns? is it my fault? i dont know. its not that i want to do this. its not that i asked for this stupid shit. it just happens.
today's incident made me wake up. it made me wake up to the fact that i'm being selfish. i'm being cruel. i'm being a hypocrite. n his decision is not helping. i'm a girl. n i understand how she should feel. because i felt it before.
damn u lah izyan.
i dont want to hurt other ppl. but if i dont, it will be to the expense of hurting myself. so which will it be izyan? others or yourself? its hard. and its UNFAIR. be it for me or for them both. i want this shit. really really badly. but i dont know if i am asking for something that is worth it. again i'm telling. i dont want to hurt other ppl. esp if they had nvr done anything wrong to me. shit. i just hate dilemmas.
boy, i soo need your help. i soo need your comfort.
i soo need your shoulders. pls dont leave me this way.
this feeling just utterly sucks.
you know i didnt ask for it right?
you know our situation right?
you know how hard this is for the both of us right?
pls tell me you do.
because i soo need YOU.

hmm. whatever u are doing shows how much u understood whatever i posted lah. can i just ask something? whatever u state at ur blog, is it stated by me? NO. its stated by a fren of mine who happens to pass by n gives her own point of view. n not me. yang terlibat dlm ni adalah saye zul dan amirah. tp knp yg lain sibuk2 ye? oh. kepo agknye. hee. ok lah. kasi chance lah kt krg. mcm deprived pulak kalau awk smua tk dpt luahkn perasaan terhadap saye. sile lah sile. kerana walau apa pun saye tau by 10 yrs down the road awk smua dah boleh berfikir dah sedar yg ape2 yg krg buat ni membosankn. so nnt pandai2 lah krg diam sendiri ye. saye byk lg hal penting yg boleh saye buat. i will keep this blog public as long as i can take it lah. if not i think i'll make it private so that u 'penyokong2' setia will not be able to interfere in my life. oh yes btw. awk nk lelong blog saye ye. hmm. kalau gitu saye pun nk lah lelong blog awk. =)))
OAK ABE ABE!

``Mat Jenin

2008-10-10T00:40:00.003+08:00

haiya. wa punyia blog sulah jati maciam itu kapal pilang!!! cho meng ah...! phang wo ah...! aiyo. korang2 ni eh. dah tkde kerja lain ke? kn tgh hari raya ni. tlg lah mak kt rumah buat ketupat ke ape ke kn lg mulia.. ni tk. duduk dpn comp spam2 blog orang. itu pon boleh gembira kah? haha. dah lah. saye tau ape salah saye. saye tau ape salah MATAIR saye dan awak puan amira roslan patut tau salah awak jugak ye. perampas pun perampas lah. janji happy? ada betul? ye saye. mmg saye bahagia sekali. teramat bahagia sekali dgn kehidupan baru yg saye jalani ni. but then it would be better without the presence of u guys lah. 'penyokong2' saye yg sudi mengambil berat ttg ape segala yg saye ingin lakukn dlm hidup saye. terima kasih lah ye tp saye ni sebenarnye dah cukup perhatian. jd saye suggest awk berilah perhatian2 awk yg tidak diperlukn di sini kepada yg lebih memerlukan seperti rumah anak2 yatim ke rumah orang2 tua ke ye tk? oh oh. maksud saye 'penyokong2' setia adalah orang2 yg sudi mengikuti kursus hidup saye dan mengkritik segala kesalahan saye. dgn mengkritik saye awk telah menjadikn saye seorang manusia yg lebih berwaspada dan lebih baik dari yg ini. ok dah. saye nk pegi romen2. jgn kepo ye. haha. OAK ABE ABE!

``Mat Jenin

ramblings.

2008-10-05T00:33:00.005+08:00

OAK ABE ABE!

so much for my later on in the day. its already a new day. haha. n i'm not asleep yet. why? i dont know. not sleepy i guess. at last. i've settled my WR articles n now the only thing that needs to be done is to send it to my dear crystal. and handry. if i get to meet u, u r soo gonna get it from me. just be prepared. grr.

just now when i came back from the library, there was nobody at home. i'm left alone. again. *apadah* so from that afternoon till night [excluding the i-dont-know-how-many-times-we-hung-up-on-each-other calls. =P] i chatted on the phone with lahling. n since i cant upload pictures to my comp due to some technical fault, i got lahling to upload it and send it to my email. aww. *sanggup awk ye? maceh.*

although my research is done, there are stilll a whole lot of things that needs to be settled. gosh. u wouldnt wanna know what are the things that i have yet to settle. all i've been doing lately is delay. delay. delay. postpone. postpone. postpone. aduh. come on yan. FORCE OI. FORCE. i seriously need to follow STRICTLY to my planned timetable man. if not. sheesh.

btw. thnx aini chic'lil. awk lah org pertama yg msg saye. saye tk menyangka. =)) dan hayati. saye syg awk jugak walaupun org kata muke awk mcm ostrich ke awk anak keling ke ape ke. saye tk kisah. kekekeke. and to all others that wished me, thank u so much. i love u guys to the core man. i swear. teehee. oh oh. before i forget. zaidah! thnx for lending me ur lappie. that is by far the greatest favour anyone had ever done for me. i love u a whole lot! *hugs* ok. i'm done with the talking. now i'm off to do the dozing. ZASSSSSSS!

``Mat Jenin

stuck

2008-10-04T12:42:00.003+08:00

oak abe abe!

i'm drained. SUPER drained. currently i'm with YB lahling *kn awk kn?* at mac doing my WR research. haiya. SUPER leceh siak. i know what i'm supposed to do but the thing is i doont know what kind of articles to focus on. i called wijayasukarno but he nvr pick up. still sleeping i guess. haha. i called crystal but she's not at home. hmm. now i'm stuck with someone who dont even know a thing abt PW and i dont know what to do. blah blah blah. ok ah. saye lapar. nk gi makan. i'll update soon. ltr on in the day. oak abe abe!

``Mat Jenin

random

2008-10-02T22:08:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe!

i was late for sch today. i woke up at approximately 7.59am. wth. i called lahling for 'only-god-knows-how-many' times but he didnt pick up. so i thought he was waiting for me at the usual. therefore i panicked n rushed to get ready. when suddenly. he called. still SUPER groggy. haha. so i know he just woke up also. phew. anw. nevertheless i still went to sch, went for maths lesson. and maths lesson only. then went for consultation with ms huang. after that. went to do some grocery shopping, ate, and went home. now i'm sitting in front of somebody's comp n blogging. teehee.

i wanna go raye. but there's so many things to do. but i have soo little time. now i'm left with 2 choices. either i do it or i go up to the umpteenth storey of a building, throw down all my notes and to-dos and try to chase for it by jumping down the building. my decision: do it. *like duh* aduh. it hurts more when i list out all the things that needs to be done. *dah mcm nk gi perang ade plan2 terperinci ni smua. rabak pe yan.* its ok. FORCE OI. FORCE. hee. i'm starting to miss MCS already. i miss drama. i miss acting. i miss their craziness. if only i could stop time. hmms. ok now i wanna go do out my final draft of my EOM. *ini anak tak habis2 dgn EOM dier.* send and i''m done.

oh oh. on a random note. my maths best friend is in LOOVE. hee. i know u know everybody know. dah dah. tkmo hide. feel the love. savour the love. i'm telling u its nicee. trust me on this will ya? oak abe abe!

``Mat Jenin

official

2008-10-01T08:16:00.002+08:00

oak abe abe!

Today marks the end of Ramadhan and the start of Syawal, therefore i would like to take this oppurtunity to wish everyone SELAMAT HARI RAYA! kalau lah ada salah dan silap saya ataupun mungkin saya ada pernah terkasar bahasa atau laku, saya menyusun sepuluh jari memohon ampun kerana sesungguhnya saya tidak pernah berniat untuk melukakn hati mana2 pihak. terutama sekali kwn2 yg rapat dgn saya. oleh dari itu sekali lagi saya mengucapkan SELAMAT HARI RAYA MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN!

OOH OOH. BTW. ITS OFFICIAL BABY. IT'S AREADY OFFICIAL. =))

``Mat Jenin

i'm not ok.

2008-09-28T14:32:00.003+08:00

these few days have been super sucky except for the fact that i had iftar on friday. somebody have been going around posing as me. and it is soo NOT funny. this poser particularly target at this particular blog at the most particular sensitive peak of time. and poser, if ur reading this i think u shud just retire from this stupid act of urs. go dig ur ass for other means of entertaining or satisfying urself. still dont know how? den i suggest u jump down from the umpteenth floor for all i care. i am soo not intimidated by u lah kn. if u r a guy that means u have no balls which means ur just a pathetic idiotic jerk that shudnt be entertained. if u r a girl then that means u r NOT a girl. u cant even come up to me n say u dont like me. or perhaps dont like the fact that i'm FUCKING happy with my beloved. get this clear in ur head. I WILL STILL LOVE HIM NO MATTER WHAT AND THERE IS NOTHING U CAN DO ABT IT. shithead. i dont know why these ppl just have to do these shitty stuff. well. i guess i'm just too popular or too perfect that some ppl just have to take advantage of every minor chances that they see to bring me down. fyi the more u do this, the more honoured i feel, the more higher i go. dumb dumb. and to ami. pls lah. i did not steal ur boyfren ok. n i did not TAG u. as if i got nothing better to do rather than get involved in ur life. the way u react at things totally proves how much u needed him in ur life. so dont make it look as if ur one big fuck and that u stood up for him in any way. firstly i thought i'd be feeling super guilty for the rest of my life. but now. i think that this may be the best decision i've made in my entire life as yet. u soo shud learn ur lesson. if not this will keep repeating itself n i will assure u not even the best of frens can make up for it. i bet he did tell u that its not me. but if u still think that its me then its up to u. a piece of advice: dont try me. i can be the most lenient girl there is on earth but when it comes to business i can make ur life as miserable as hell to the extent that u'd be feeling sorry that u'd ever known me. so pls. think before u even come to any conclusion. because i hate having enemies. period.

lahling. i'm sorry. i still wanna be with u though.

``Mat Jenin

hari raya preparations

2008-09-25T20:43:00.008+08:00

today was fun. during sastera class we were assigned to decorate certain areas of the school with Hari Raya decorations by Cg Rasiah. so we divided the class into 2. half of them went to decorate the front of the general office while the other half of us stayed in class to stick those envelopes toegether so that we can hang em up. so yeah. we stapled n stapled and stapled n we're done. when suddenly somebody amongst us suggested, "eh korang! ape kate kite buat ucapan hari raya?" n i thought it was a great idea! haha. just take a look at the videos at the end of the post yah. the longer one is the second try. i thought the song was a bit too loud. tell me which one u guys prefer cuz i wanna send the better one to mediacorp. hee! nevertheless i had FUN! =)

ok den after sastera we had mgt. they went thru the ans n then we had our 4 periods of break. dah boring. tk tau ape nk buat, i decided to go to the o hub. stared in front of the comp until my eyes hurt n then slept during the last break period before heading off to PE. *aduh. dah puase. panas terik pulak tu.* we were told to run 4 rounds then we are free to play our games. after PE is actually the climax of my day. me n other sastera ppl sat by the carpark curb by the stadium n sang hari raya songs. haha. *terase kejap suasane raye ye tk?* keke. i had fun lah. thnx eh korang! =) for a moment there i didnt feel thirsty or hungry. after that met lahling who waited for me *aww so sweet.* n we headed back home. now. i'm sitting in front of the comp again checking my inbox. so many matters for me to handle n settle. alright i think i'll stop for now. i'll update soon. oh yah. here's the videos. enjoy. ZASSSS!

``Mat Jenin

in sch.

2008-09-24T17:59:00.003+08:00

right now, i'm actually in the school's library. i just finished my MCS meeting abt an hr ago. then i borrowed nizar's laptop. n i'm currently using it. hee. during the meeting just nw, we talked and discussed abt impt issues n matters. gosh. i didnt know there's so many thngs to be done in so little time. luckily the work load tallies with the number of members we have. that is if i consider everyone as somebody whom i can trust and depend on. hmm. i dont wanna mention names but i just feel that ppl are just not doing their part. no matter how many times ppl try to talk to them they just still remained the same. its hard esp knowing that i love them to the core. haiya. manyak susah lah tu.

i was doing my maths revision abt 10 mins ago when i decided to blog. particularly abt.. nothing at all. haha. pathetic kn? no lah. actually i was so freaking attracted to nizar's lappie lah. the espresso black colour makes me drool. hee. it looks like cappuccino coffee to me. =)) gonna break fast outside because i'm staying for night study. most probably with hafiz handry n lahling.

eh eh. hold on eh.

................................................

k dah. i took some pictures of us in the library. my lahling is obviously stressed out with the heavy work load that he has to get done before the exams. kn abang? hahaha. saya dah habis exam. awak bile pulak? kekeke. ooh ooh. n i managed to get lahling's timetable. look at what he did. typical kedi-ak. =))

ps. grr. i so hate u lah lahling. kediak. ish. siak. sundet.

``Mat Jenin

them.

2008-09-23T16:21:00.004+08:00

dear fafa.
i envy ur strength in going thru whatever shit that happens to u every single time. i hope u can just stay strong n just wait. i know u'll be able to pull thru. dont lie to urself. be true n honest abt ur feelings n everything's going to turn out right. u will be happy then. i know u can do it, gerl. fyi i'll always be there for u if ever u need me. aku sayang kau tau.

dear hidayah.
ur willingness to hold on even though thru all these times has made me look up to u one notch higher. u've been thru harder times n i believe that this time u can hold on also. maybe u just need time. time to think n reflect abt ur actions. ur decisions. i understand. but i just want u to know one thing. i will now n forever be beside u to see u thru ur hard times. and thats because i love u. no matter what, i'll try to do anything to help u out of ur messy situation. dont give up darl. cuz u know u'll be at the losing end if u do. n pls. dont do decision when ur in a confused state of mind. u know it's wrong don't u?

``Mat Jenin

MUNA

2008-09-22T23:08:00.002+08:00

omg. thnx to MUNA my blog is working again. gosh. i spent the past 70 yrs of my life tryina figure out the prob siak. n now it's solved! thanks to... MUNA! ish. sayang kau hardcore ah babe. wa caya sama lu ah, computer freak. keke. ok dah. i want to hit the publish button now. ZASSSSS!

``Mat Jenin